Mom, Hipsters Are Eating the Reefer Again

We are so screwed ... and I quote:

"There's your popular strains that most people who enjoy cannabis have heard of, like your Blue Dreams and your Girl Scout Cookies. But we also wanted to include the rare ones."  

(Health News from NPR: "Looks Good Enough To Smoke: Marijuana Gets Its Glamour Moment" - maybe before your purchase of the book being hustled in the article you might want to make your consideration based on the grammar, or the lack of it, in that statement)

Are you fucking serious?  I don't know if he's talking about catching a buzz or shooting black rhinos just because you don't have a head from each animal in the world.  Just as the Lord put the animals on the Ark, you'll take those muddafuggas back off it.

Note:  I have never heard of either type of reefer.  You finda da ganja wit da red an' purple whiskas, you find da right ganja.

Thank you, Health News from NPR, for this gem of metaphysical delight.

Holy flying fish that screw in the sky, who the fuck are these people ... other than being pretentious nitwits, I mean.  They will make a science out of getting stoned which, in Truth, consists of getting hammered, doing weird shit, telling people you talked to God, the end.  Repeat as many times as desired.

Maybe it pisses you off that I say God has a sense of humor but Paul said he can't believe in a God that can't dance but I can't believe in a God that can't laugh.  We're in his image, yes?  He fookin' laughs.  Not every Dagwood out there dances but everybody laughs.

You say Jesus never laughed?  GetOuttaTown

There is one good thing about hipsters as stoners aren't usually being accused of giving reefer to children anymore.  That one really would frost my goznitch to Antartica as who is going to waste expensive ganja on a kid.  Makes no sense whatsoever.

I have blown reefer at dogs as they like it.  I will go to hell for that (sniff) but they really do like it.  I never once forced a dog to do that.  We don't know if they do it because they're Man's Best Friend or because they want to hear some more Hendrix.  What sounds do you suppose a stoned dog hears from Hendrix as the audio spectrum is wider.  And there's yer Trippy Li'l Stoner Thought for the Day.

Just as I reveal my unfamiliarity with Snowflake Paradise or whatever the latest trendy fashion weed, I find I'm developing a profound allergy to the smoke ... or to hipsters ... unknown.

So, that's unusual, isn't it.

You ain't hip until you have had a huge raven launch straight at your eyes because it wants your reefer and it's going to get it.  When you're willing to get poked in the eye with the beak of a satanic blackbird, then I'll believe you're hip to reefer.  The Mystery Lady can attest every word of this is true.

Hipsters ... Whew.  (shakes head and smokes some reefer ... of absolutely unknown variety but magnificently capable)