Governor Mike Pence (R,IN) admitted today he believes in God but has never read the Bible and doesn't go to church. He said that made him just as qualified to speak on Christianity as any other American as they haven't read it either.
He was then advised that national growth in the Catholic Church last year was .57%. Relating that in Wall Street terms, the only stock that did worse was the futures market in IBM Selectric typewriters. And this was one of the few faiths seeing any gains at all.
Pence replied of course he knows this as why the hell do we think he runs the church victimization campaigns.
He really perked up when we told him, man, you will really like this as Leviticus 19:28 says you'll go to Hell for getting a tattoo.
You shall not make any cuts on your body for the dead or tattoo yourselves: I am the LORD.
He was then advised that national growth in the Catholic Church last year was .57%. Relating that in Wall Street terms, the only stock that did worse was the futures market in IBM Selectric typewriters. And this was one of the few faiths seeing any gains at all.
Pence replied of course he knows this as why the hell do we think he runs the church victimization campaigns.
He really perked up when we told him, man, you will really like this as Leviticus 19:28 says you'll go to Hell for getting a tattoo.
You shall not make any cuts on your body for the dead or tattoo yourselves: I am the LORD.
- English Standard Bible
This really got him jazzed as he realized, man, I can get rid of those creepy-looking people with piercings in unusual places too. This is excellent.
This really got him jazzed as he realized, man, I can get rid of those creepy-looking people with piercings in unusual places too. This is excellent.
Look for legislation soon to ban tattoo parlors and piercing in Indiana because of one Hoosier's fervent desire to live according to Scripture, if only he knew what exactly is in Scripture.
The part I love about all this is the Christians pull the basis for hating gay people out of the Old Testament even after Christianity replaced it with the New Testament. No wonder they're confused, they don't even know which book to read ... so they don't read anything but sound bites from either one.
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