There are few people in the world less-qualified than myself for building the Perfect Trash Car as this is an automobile that will have at least 600-700 hp ... and there won't even be a sign of that power unless you look closely.
That might be the rule of the Perfect Trash Car, that it has immense power but no-one can see it until you demonstrate. I've been calling my middle brother Doc but he said he was the other dick so I don't know if that means Dick Doc or Doc Dick but I'll stick with Doc. He's the one who builds trash cars and it seems he won't even put one of these things in his garage unless it's got at least the horsepower rating I listed above. Do believe he can do it as professionally he sells and fixes construction equipment but right next to that equipment was a red '67 GTO.
Maybe you think, oh yeah, I remember ... 389, three deuces, yeah, yeah. Sure, that was a nice motor. But Doc isn't satisfied with nice motors. He wants them that shoot fire out the exhaust. I'm not sure if his first build hit ten seconds in a quarter mile as he ran out of money before he could race it but there were some runs and I gather it was at or near that mark.
The ten-second quarter mile in drag racing is like making a hole-in-one ... on all eighteen holes ... or it would be if golf were any more dangerous than crocheting a blanket for your dog.
Back to that GTO. It looked like it was box stock unless you looked closely at the size of the tires on it. There were no cheesy flames or look-at-me paint job, this is stealth speed, very high stealth speed.
The problem most American cars have is they put all the weight up-front. The only way to balance big iron in the front is to make the whole car heavy and now it's a pig, otherwise known as an SUV. Arnold Schwarzenegger may buy one but that's only because he can eat it after he's tired of it, assuming he doesn't try to have sex with it, I suppose. (Schwarzi ... his friends call him Schwarzi ... was the first to buy a Hummer in California. That Schwarzi, always an environmental trendsetter.)
Dodge just released an SRT Hellcat with 707 hp stock but it's a big hemi V8 up-front and the car is quite heavy. Now if the car were lower, lighter, and the engine mounted mid-frame then you would have a car for some serious motoring. That you could take to Nürburgring. The Hellcat you could only take to a dragstrip.
I think stealth is a big component of being a trash car but I don't know for sure. There is no report about riding in one as I stopped riding with Doc years ago. I will drive very fast and he knows it as we raced each other for years but I won't let anyone drive me very fast, blood or no. The last time he did it, I had just got out of hospital from my own smash-up so this did not result in a Positive Bonding Experience. It wasn't personal, there's hardly anyone I trust to drive me.
Mostly I've been fairly good about observing a No Civilians Rule for driving but one time I was riding Lotho's FJ1200 and he was riding his FZR1000 (it was actually faster). I was cruising at 130 mph / 210 kph with Mrs Silas on the back and she was fine. If she had been upset I would have known it and if I had been afraid then she would have felt it so it was very good cruising on a bright summer day ... and then a blue flash went by at somewhere at or above 160 mph / 260 kph. And that was Lotho with Mrs Lotho on the back. If you're going to break the No Civilians Rule, smash it all to hell!
The Mystery Lady may be seeing here for the first time how fast we were going. It might have been better to keep my mouth shut ... but I'm so good at that.
That might be the rule of the Perfect Trash Car, that it has immense power but no-one can see it until you demonstrate. I've been calling my middle brother Doc but he said he was the other dick so I don't know if that means Dick Doc or Doc Dick but I'll stick with Doc. He's the one who builds trash cars and it seems he won't even put one of these things in his garage unless it's got at least the horsepower rating I listed above. Do believe he can do it as professionally he sells and fixes construction equipment but right next to that equipment was a red '67 GTO.
Maybe you think, oh yeah, I remember ... 389, three deuces, yeah, yeah. Sure, that was a nice motor. But Doc isn't satisfied with nice motors. He wants them that shoot fire out the exhaust. I'm not sure if his first build hit ten seconds in a quarter mile as he ran out of money before he could race it but there were some runs and I gather it was at or near that mark.
The ten-second quarter mile in drag racing is like making a hole-in-one ... on all eighteen holes ... or it would be if golf were any more dangerous than crocheting a blanket for your dog.
Back to that GTO. It looked like it was box stock unless you looked closely at the size of the tires on it. There were no cheesy flames or look-at-me paint job, this is stealth speed, very high stealth speed.
The problem most American cars have is they put all the weight up-front. The only way to balance big iron in the front is to make the whole car heavy and now it's a pig, otherwise known as an SUV. Arnold Schwarzenegger may buy one but that's only because he can eat it after he's tired of it, assuming he doesn't try to have sex with it, I suppose. (Schwarzi ... his friends call him Schwarzi ... was the first to buy a Hummer in California. That Schwarzi, always an environmental trendsetter.)
Dodge just released an SRT Hellcat with 707 hp stock but it's a big hemi V8 up-front and the car is quite heavy. Now if the car were lower, lighter, and the engine mounted mid-frame then you would have a car for some serious motoring. That you could take to Nürburgring. The Hellcat you could only take to a dragstrip.
I think stealth is a big component of being a trash car but I don't know for sure. There is no report about riding in one as I stopped riding with Doc years ago. I will drive very fast and he knows it as we raced each other for years but I won't let anyone drive me very fast, blood or no. The last time he did it, I had just got out of hospital from my own smash-up so this did not result in a Positive Bonding Experience. It wasn't personal, there's hardly anyone I trust to drive me.
Mostly I've been fairly good about observing a No Civilians Rule for driving but one time I was riding Lotho's FJ1200 and he was riding his FZR1000 (it was actually faster). I was cruising at 130 mph / 210 kph with Mrs Silas on the back and she was fine. If she had been upset I would have known it and if I had been afraid then she would have felt it so it was very good cruising on a bright summer day ... and then a blue flash went by at somewhere at or above 160 mph / 260 kph. And that was Lotho with Mrs Lotho on the back. If you're going to break the No Civilians Rule, smash it all to hell!
The Mystery Lady may be seeing here for the first time how fast we were going. It might have been better to keep my mouth shut ... but I'm so good at that.
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