Tuesday, January 13, 2015

How to Raise Chinchillas at Home

There doesn't seem any interest in shooting the Video of Ultimate Coolness with a camera on my head so I see I need to be open to more things.

Then the epiphany, a how-to video on raising chinchillas.  For this I only need a pair of Wayfarers and the static camera in the laptop.  I'll get one of the cats and there's a Davy Crockett hat right here so I can use that to pass it off as a chinchilla.  Maybe I could glue it on there.  All I need is some Super Glue, right.

(Ed:  you stole that from "Scrooged")

Right you are, matey, and I am not ashamed.  Shame is a delight for the young.  The old don't give a fuck.

(Ed:  so how do you explain to Yevette how a Davy Crockett hat got super-glued to one of the cats?)

I do see how this could present a problem.  Surely she would understand sacrifices have to be made for cinema.

(Ed:  perhaps so but not by cats)

Good point, that.  OK.  No Super Glue.

(Ed:  Reverend Sasquatch will speak about raising chinchillas?)

Nah, he's fired.  Everyone is so pissed off about religion that it's not fun to screw with it.

This needs a new character.  Maybe Calamity Scarborough.  He's related to Calamity Jane but he never hit anything when he shot.  Calamity Jane went on to become the Queen of Six Guns and Calamity Scarborough went on to raise chinchillas.

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