Don't get all weepy on me as this ain't about a kid getting a pony.
The day before yesterday I did the DAYUM job cleaning up after those cats. Today was payday so this morning I went down to Hell-Mart and got a can of unstinkifier that you don't have to vacuum, the foam goes down to the deepest part of your carpet and deodorizes it. I figured, ok, if some is good then using the whole fookin' can is better. For quite a few hours I was thinking, man, this sickly sweet smell is worse than the cats but either it faded or I got used to it.
Yes, I know you're already at the punchline.
So we arrive at My First Christmas Gift. Makes you all teary, don't it. (Say that Texan style. It was a Texas cat.)
I figured, ok, we're using dog training on this. I took the cat over, put her face in it, and chucked her fat ass outside. The only trouble is she may not regard it as punishment as she likes it better out there. She comes back for the chow ... and to (cough) relieve herself on the newly-cleaned carpet.
Update: it occurred to me that maybe I need to be clear on something. No, I don't hit animals. No question she knew I was annoyed, tho.
Here's the beauty part: yes, the shitterbox was immaculate. They had been using it but I keep it clean. I'm much less of a skank than the music room shows as music rooms are particularly difficult to keep clean because of the cables.
Maybe you remember my mention of Knecht Ruprecht in previous articles as he comes around with Santa and if you were a bad kid then he will fuck you up. He terrifies German kids.
So ...
It looks like Knecht Ruprecht has found the house.
There is one good cat here, tho. There's an orange and white one around the front. I put some chow out there each morning and it's not because I'm collecting them but rather I'm carrying on the tradition. Sometimes in the morning I'll hear a cat crying and it freaks me out with wtf is happening here. Then I'll realize it's coming from outside and it's that orange and white one screaming, hey, you're late. That one has definitely had its assertiveness training. No chance I'll let it in the house but I do like its boldness.
Since the purpose of these cats is rat-killin', it seems counter-productive to feed them but I'm 100% the house is free of uninvited four-leggers so they do seem to get it done. So I feed 'em.
As to feeding the Christmas Giver, we shall see. Ha!
The day before yesterday I did the DAYUM job cleaning up after those cats. Today was payday so this morning I went down to Hell-Mart and got a can of unstinkifier that you don't have to vacuum, the foam goes down to the deepest part of your carpet and deodorizes it. I figured, ok, if some is good then using the whole fookin' can is better. For quite a few hours I was thinking, man, this sickly sweet smell is worse than the cats but either it faded or I got used to it.
Yes, I know you're already at the punchline.
So we arrive at My First Christmas Gift. Makes you all teary, don't it. (Say that Texan style. It was a Texas cat.)
I figured, ok, we're using dog training on this. I took the cat over, put her face in it, and chucked her fat ass outside. The only trouble is she may not regard it as punishment as she likes it better out there. She comes back for the chow ... and to (cough) relieve herself on the newly-cleaned carpet.
Update: it occurred to me that maybe I need to be clear on something. No, I don't hit animals. No question she knew I was annoyed, tho.
Here's the beauty part: yes, the shitterbox was immaculate. They had been using it but I keep it clean. I'm much less of a skank than the music room shows as music rooms are particularly difficult to keep clean because of the cables.
Maybe you remember my mention of Knecht Ruprecht in previous articles as he comes around with Santa and if you were a bad kid then he will fuck you up. He terrifies German kids.
So ...
It looks like Knecht Ruprecht has found the house.
There is one good cat here, tho. There's an orange and white one around the front. I put some chow out there each morning and it's not because I'm collecting them but rather I'm carrying on the tradition. Sometimes in the morning I'll hear a cat crying and it freaks me out with wtf is happening here. Then I'll realize it's coming from outside and it's that orange and white one screaming, hey, you're late. That one has definitely had its assertiveness training. No chance I'll let it in the house but I do like its boldness.
Since the purpose of these cats is rat-killin', it seems counter-productive to feed them but I'm 100% the house is free of uninvited four-leggers so they do seem to get it done. So I feed 'em.
As to feeding the Christmas Giver, we shall see. Ha!
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