This is a crap article and I only wrote it because I'm killing time because I can't find something.
This one is for our lesbian friends. Millennials act all socially conscious for gay rights but they don't do anything and instead talk and act like they invented the idea and wait for others to catch up.
But
We know all you want is for people to stop fucking with you and stop treating you like monkeys. Good news hearing lesbian porno turns you on, Cracker Boy, but here's a tip: no possible chance you will ever see it for real.
You think that's all you want.
But
That must mean you have already forgotten Monica Lewinski flavored cigars. We've gained a lot of inspiration from Bill Clinton as we know if we watch the sick shit he does then there's a possible moneymaker in providing that to others.
So
We know already there is demand for the Monica Lewinsky flavored cigar. As soon as we come to contractual terms with her, we will be releasing our debut smoke: The Lewinsky. Enjoy the deepest, most satisfying smoke you ever had in your life.
Then we started thinking ... Clinton is just an amateur. If you really want the sick shit, let's go to the Supreme Court and get Ruth Ginsberg on the team. How about that for our follow-up release. The Ruthie, the smoke for when you want to do the stuff that's too cool for most other lesbians to understand.
We also need one from that snowflake in Congress ... ah, Pelosi. Yes, that would be our third release but no-one would smoke it. This is one we would market so conservatives can buy it and hate it.
Some of you may be thinking we will release The Palin after that but it would be pointless. We tried once before but as soon as you start getting busy, she passes out and falls asleep. If you want sex like that, just get a man.
She's history now but The Feinstein was under consideration. We abandoned the idea as it would always lie. Instead of going where it said it would, it poked elsewhere. But maybe some of you like that so we could reconsider.
There are millions to be made as fundamental to marketing is understanding no-one ever lost money catering to the sick shit happening here. They even built a whole city for it: Vegas.
(There is a solution to the sick shit. Make all tickets into Las Vegas one-way but don't tell anyone. You can get in but you can't get out. Ha!)
This one is for our lesbian friends. Millennials act all socially conscious for gay rights but they don't do anything and instead talk and act like they invented the idea and wait for others to catch up.
But
We know all you want is for people to stop fucking with you and stop treating you like monkeys. Good news hearing lesbian porno turns you on, Cracker Boy, but here's a tip: no possible chance you will ever see it for real.
You think that's all you want.
But
That must mean you have already forgotten Monica Lewinski flavored cigars. We've gained a lot of inspiration from Bill Clinton as we know if we watch the sick shit he does then there's a possible moneymaker in providing that to others.
So
We know already there is demand for the Monica Lewinsky flavored cigar. As soon as we come to contractual terms with her, we will be releasing our debut smoke: The Lewinsky. Enjoy the deepest, most satisfying smoke you ever had in your life.
Then we started thinking ... Clinton is just an amateur. If you really want the sick shit, let's go to the Supreme Court and get Ruth Ginsberg on the team. How about that for our follow-up release. The Ruthie, the smoke for when you want to do the stuff that's too cool for most other lesbians to understand.
We also need one from that snowflake in Congress ... ah, Pelosi. Yes, that would be our third release but no-one would smoke it. This is one we would market so conservatives can buy it and hate it.
Some of you may be thinking we will release The Palin after that but it would be pointless. We tried once before but as soon as you start getting busy, she passes out and falls asleep. If you want sex like that, just get a man.
She's history now but The Feinstein was under consideration. We abandoned the idea as it would always lie. Instead of going where it said it would, it poked elsewhere. But maybe some of you like that so we could reconsider.
There are millions to be made as fundamental to marketing is understanding no-one ever lost money catering to the sick shit happening here. They even built a whole city for it: Vegas.
(There is a solution to the sick shit. Make all tickets into Las Vegas one-way but don't tell anyone. You can get in but you can't get out. Ha!)
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