Sunday, July 30, 2017

The Immaculate Conception of Ivanka Trump (Princess Sugar Tits)

Verily, the questions poured into the Rockhouse beseeching us for the Origin of the Sugar Tits.

Here is a helpful tip from an expert in the Anglican Church ... you know, the One Which Is Mostly Catholic but Isn't.

I meant to post this the other day when you mentioned "sugar tits", but I forgot. I don't know if you've ever heard of this. When I and my siblings were small children and we would cry for little or no good reason, my mom would ask "Do I need to make you a sugar tit?"

I don't remember if at that time we knew exactly what she was talking about, but we were all old enough to know that at our ages, very young though we were, that whatever it was, it would have been shameful or at least embarrassing to say the least.

Now, what I want to know is this - do these sugar tits serve the same purpose as the old-fashioned kind? And is anyone else other than Jared getting to make use of these sugar tits?

- the Right Reverend Clark Weddle from the Church of Pointless Anguish and Utter Bloody Nonsense (Anglican)

As to whether the Sugar Tits are featuring much in Jared Kushner's life, we can't say for sure but it doesn't seem likely.  (Observer:  Who’s Avoiding Sex, and Why)

That rise came in parallel with the increases in social networks, prescription narcotics, and the social anomie of the Western world.

The Rockhouse interest is in the divine gift of the Sugar Tits since no-one knows where they really originated so surely they were a blessing from Heaven.

Sugar tit is a folk name for a baby pacifier, or dummy, that was once commonly made and used in North America and Britain. It was made by placing a spoonful of sugar, or honey, in a small patch of clean cloth, then gathering the cloth around the sugar and twisting it to form a bulb. The bulb was then secured by twine or a rubber band. The baby's saliva would slowly dissolve the sugar in the bulb.

In use the exposed outfolded fabric could give the appearance of a flower in the baby's mouth. David Ransel quotes a Russian study by Dr. N. E. Kushev while discussing a similar home-made cloth-and-food pacifier called a soska; there, the term "flower" as used colloquially by mothers, refers to a bloom of mold in the child's mouth caused by decay of the contents.

As early as 1802 a German physician, Christian Struve, described the sugar tit as "one of the most revolting customs".

WIKI:  Sugar tit

There you see it.  Princess Sugar Tits is truly a gift from our dear Lord.

Ed:  why wasn't she given a heart?

Her father did not think she would need one and cut it from the budget.

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