Thursday, March 23, 2017

Maine Gives Us All a Reason to Feel Superior

Feeling superior is one of the great perks of the Internet since everywhere we look we can find something absolutely ludicrous and think, "Damn, what kind of brain-challenged bozo would do such a thing."

I'm sure I give that inspiration often and it makes me so proud (sigh).

Feeling superior gives us endless titillation online and we're never disappointed when we look to Maine since the governor is someone they salvaged from parts in an Alabama junkyard and somehow taught it a few words of English.  Check him out sometime since Paul LePage is a True Prince of Politics.

In January, he attributed Maine’s opioid epidemic to “guys with the name D-Money, Smoothie, Shifty [who] come from Connecticut and New York, they come up here, they sell their heroin, they go back home [and] half the time they impregnate a young white girl before they leave.”

- Washington Post


Maine’s Portland Press Herald published FBI statistics showing that the overwhelming majority of those arrested in Maine for drug offenses in 2014 were white; just 14 percent were black.

- Washington Post

I'm tellin' you, he's a Prince.  Perhaps you wonder how such raging racist bitch like that can get elected and certainly you must say it comes from the genius of the electorate.


Behold the genius of that electorate in Maine:


Fire Marshal investigators said Devon Doucette, 21, was attempting to kill ants in the basement of the home by burning them with matches.

- WMUR

Let's contemplate that fact for just a moment since we don't quite grok the process.  Does he chase each ant with a match and then brutally burn it?  How does this even work?


Apparently it didn't ...

Authorities say one of the matches ignited nearby combustibles and spread quickly to the rest of the Harmon Avenue home.

- WMUR

There's still some trouble grokking this since did he try to chase down one of those pesky ants and a match just got away from him so the house caught fire?  wtf??


The house was owned by Doucette's parents and is considered a total loss.

- WMUR

Dude!  You burned down your parents' fucking house?  Fucking dude!  What an asshole!


Firefighters said one dog and two cats were killed in the fire.

- WMUR

He even got some critters dead.  What a screaming asshole!


Investigators said it is unlikely Doucette will face any charges.

- WMUR:  Maine man trying to kill ants accidentally sets house on fire, officials say


Welcome to Maine.  Don't worry about that idiot governor since we will deal with him, well, after we can get the fire extinguished.

Ed:  and the ants.  Don't miss those.

Yes, and the ants as well.  Thank you.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Poor statistic to quote on arrests.
Maine is not known for diversity.
Look up population by race.
Nationally those percentages seem reasonable. In Maine though it looks as if Maine is lily white with only a 3% non white population

Peas InOurThyme said...

They were just throwing that one because that's the state LePage was reporting. That showed LePage was lying / didn't know the subject / was race baiting but the stats aren't accurate for the country as a whole.

Anonymous said...

He was only quoting for Maine.
So he was correct with the stats even though he is a loser with loser ideals

Peas InOurThyme said...

Unknown how LePage manages to continue embarrassing Mainders but they keep electing him it seems. You've got your Eisenhower Republicans and then, well, whatever he is.