Saturday, September 13, 2014

Dealing with the Scottish Insurgents and Russian Aggression

Vessels of Russian registry have been observed off the coast of Scotland in recent weeks and particularly since Cameron flew the Saltire (national flag of Scotland) over 10 Downing Street.  While the vessels appear to be large fishing ships, they have been unloading cargo to smaller vessels which have then been transporting it to shore.

CIA analysts say they have credible intelligence telling them the products being unloaded are munitions, specifically a unique type of launcher the Russians have not yet presented in the field.  The Pentagon is also involved and said they have identified through satellite images certain notorious members of the Russian arms trafficking syndicates.  The CIA added it's been the history of Vladimir Putin to use members of the Russian Mafia to distribute weapons and this, in large part, was what caused the Falklands War.

The CIA also advises meetings with Scottish insurgents have been taking place with Russian operatives in Scotland.  They said they are sure the operatives are from Russia as their English is too good for them to be Scotsmen.

In a special briefing from the White House, Jen Psaki said on behalf of President Obama that F-16 fighters will be placed along the border with Scotland to ensure the peace and prevent Russian aggression and terrorism from Scotland.  His statement read that he regretted the U.S. role as the world's police force but he would not shirk that responsibility and if'n somethin' needs killin' then he's going to kill it.

The clear and immediate danger from Scottish terrorists using the launchers to hurl haggis into England cannot be overlooked.  Haggis is made from a sheep's intestine and no-one should come in contact with a sheep's rectum other than the sheep and one or more Scotsmen.

As ever, remain vigilant as Russian aggression is everywhere.

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