Sunday, June 18, 2017

When the Man Who Hates Cellphones the Most Has to Buy One

My wild-eyed blazing hatred of cellphones (possible exaggeration) isn't from lack of knowledge of them since I was packing a big whacking Motorola mobile back in the 90s in part because such phones were a huge hassle but so much better than the infuriation of beepers which I loathe even more.

That cellphone entanglement continued through the iPhone series and, after some while with it, I finally decided I was fed up with so much damnable convenience and would have nothing more to do with them.  The consequence of having the phone immediately available was using it constantly with the result it didn't just nibble by free time but rather ate it whole.

That blissful peace absent of any idiotic ring tones lasted for over three years and I didn't miss that cellphone convenience ... except sometimes for difficult situations in a world which doesn't use landlines too much except in public offices or at least customer-facing offices.

The situation did come to No Other Choice and that, with greatly-appreciated help, has just happened so I've got an iPhone SE and it only supports GSM but that was the way Apple got into it originally until the customer-hating GSM / CDMA wars started with Verizon which only meant now one needs a bilingual GSM/CDMA phone and it costs a thousand fucking dollars to buy it.

Ed:  they can now provide an illusory state of health with apps, whatsits, and things which aren't really that invasive

Fuck you, Ed

I got the Handy yesterday and I like the Euro slang better mostly from riding behind some whacko in Pyrgos who was dodging in and out of traffic, as everyone on a scooter will do, but all the while he had a Handy to his ear.

You may find it amusing as it was a hoot making it.  Just about anything in it would ignite road rage in U.S. but there it's just Greeks driving around town.  There are no squealing tires, angry people, or dillwadds popping wheelies ... it's just a classical gas.

Note:  the language is my broken German but you won't have a problem with it and there's been relative enthusiasm for the vid.

All the links for the ML EL have now been validated as working ... but ... I still haven't called anyone and Yevette didn't do anything more than a few texts to ensure that aspect worked.

Cadillac Man thought it was all amusing about acquiring a cellphone but I didn't publicize well enough the letters stand for the Magic Land Emergency Line although there is also a variation of that but with the same meaning.

I do have unlimited minutes on the service but everything else is throttled.  However, there's the Handy Elbow Syndrome from holding a Handy to your ear for too long and one's arm can be frozen forever in that position ... or at least it feels like that after a while.

To prevent the HES situation, one needs a Bluetooth earpiece for, oh, fifty bucks or so but this crank didn't even buy a case for the iPhone.  I'm the customer they don't want to see since I don't want the thing to be anything but a telephone which moves and I bought zero accessories.

The only content the iPhone is permitted to sync when connected to the iMac is either system software downloads or calendar information / contacts.  Music and photos are specifically excluded.

Note:  I've tried those damnable earbuds and they're like earwigs but without pincers.  Will never happen.

Ed:  but they have such rich, dynamic sound!

Enjoy that glorious sound right up to tinnitus which you will enjoy for the rest of your damn life, Einstein.  Yeah, yeah, keep on 'splainin', manboy.  It comes at about D or D# at the highest frettable pitch of the guitar and it never fucking stops.  Is that clear enough.

There has been no revelation of cell numbers to anyone in the circle unless the link existed already.  It's been the tightest with Mystery Lady, Yevette, and I so any can contact anyone else but that isn't true for Cadillac Man or Lotho and it's not my position to presume.

Maybe the move is for C.M. or Lotho to send a yea / nay via Comment and I'll take that to mean go ahead with sending your number to the others and they can react however they will.  The more the ML EL is decentralized, the better it serves Papa Marx anyway.  I won't presume to make a move that way so send a sign if you want me to do it.

The conversation with C.M. was goodness for its own sake and mostly stayed to politico-historical trends but that goes way beyond the scope of the topic of hating Handy devices, regardless of whatever people may affectionately call them.

Tip:  it's just a fucking machine, Dorothy.

People worry about Artificial Intelligence taking over and it will ... but only if you fucking let it.

Am I right, my brothers and sisters?

Of course Uncle Silas is right (larfs).

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