Thursday, July 7, 2016

Sex in Self-Driving Cars

There's only one important consideration for a self-driving car:  can you screw in it.

Of course your intelligent car lets you vary the tinting on the windows so you can go full transparent for watching the scenery which reveals itself maybe two percent of the time you're driving on some crumby road somewhere.  The intelligent tinting also allows you go to full midnight if you want to get down to some nefarious behavior within the vehicle.  Why not as it's not like there's much else to do and these cars won't, at least not soon, go even the same general speed as the flow of traffic now.  The circuitry won't let them go over the speed limit, you can bank on that.


There's one thing we know with full-midnight window tinting, tho.  It's a cop magnet.  If they can't see what you're doing then those creeper peeper cops want to look.

Maybe you think the cops can want all they like ... but you're thinking these self-driving cars will work like regular ones ... which do not have copper stopper circuitry.

What, you may ask, is copper stopper circuitry and that's the software in the self-driving car which gets a signal from police to kill the ignition / driving mode for the vehicle.  You can almost guarantee the vehicles will be so equipped because cops want to make the public safe, man.  They have a major strange trip on fucking but really they want to keep us safe ... from something.


Oh, and maybe you're thinking, well, that's ok if cops do that to stop crime.  Maybe.


How about the finance company which actually owns the vehicle.  What do you suspect will happen after you blow a couple of payments.  The guess here at the Rockhouse is they will be able to kick off the copper stopper circuitry as well.  Sorry, Charlie.  Bus for you today.


Maybe that becomes the general prod to get you to do anything in the future.  Either you pay for that 3D Opti-Blaster rental or we shut off yer fookin' car.


We still don't get who wants these things but the only comment regarding the drivers on I-20 on the way to VA was, "These cowboys drive like they play pachinko."

Self-driving cars would stop that kind of incompetence and the carnage which would come from it but what do they do about the much more dangerous people who slow down the road because, gee, I don't feel safe going any faster.  These are the people who should be stuffed with dry rice and then made to drink cold water until they explode.  Yah, tell me that's not true the next time you get stuck behind Mario Truckdriver Andretti in the fast lane.


The self-driving trucks are already on the road in tests in Europe and those will likely be everywhere quickly because, hey ho, that's a chance to kill another union and they hate the Teamsters most of all.

(Ed:  the truckers in the fast lane probably aren't Teamsters)

That's probably true but that doesn't console your rage when you get stuck behind whomever is driving that slow ass piece of crap up there, does it.  Scabs make everyone look bad.


Maybe it evolves with self-driving, big-rig trucks being deployed first and this seems credible due to the state of the technology and the willingness of corporations to kill unions.

The passenger cars seem planned to roll out on some indeterminate schedule with indeterminate acceptance so this aspect is deeply puzzling.  It seems the only way people will give up their right to the wheel is under mandate of law.  It's just inconceivable to me people will do that otherwise ... but inconceivable things happen all the time, that's part of the kick of being a Hatter.

(Ed:  what right to the wheel?)

You're right.  No-one has any right to drive as that was just an agreement and the state can take it away if it likes.  You may get pissed but there's no fundamental right to have it.


Ah well, this is fortune telling and one thing we know about fortune telling is Jeanne Dixon would be worth so many millions if she were writing that crazy crapola today.  She would be a Fox News Goddess.

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