Monday, May 15, 2017

The Demon Interloper Had to Get the Water

All Rockhouse cats must understand:  it behaves nicely with the other cats or it gets the water.

Today the Demon Interloper Cat came back and she's some rich bitch fluffy cat who thinks she owns everything ...

but ...

she does not own the Super Soaker.

I set out two bowls of cat chow out front and the preferred seat goes to the Homegirl Cat but there's an alternate seat for Mississippi Orange plus another timid grey one which shows up.  They get along so I don't care.

The Demon Interloper Cat was out there earlier and I chased her off before feeding the others.  She knew she only had to wait until I went back inside and then she could come back up and I knew she would because it's the way Rich Bitch Fluffy Cats are.

but ...

I knew she knew she only had to wait ...

so ...

I went out to the back to get Toby the Dog some water ... and took the Super Soaker with me.

After Toby the Dog had his water, I went back out through the gate to come around to the front yard on the other side relative to the front door.

Ed:  cut off the avenue of escape?

Precisely.  The Rich Bitch Fluffy Cat must get the water.

And she fuckin' did with a near direct hit and then pump, pump, pump to keep firing at her.  Those cats ran like they were generals in a war zone.

Pollyanna:  you're a horrible, evil person and earwigs should crawl into your ears to eat whatever disease has left of your brain.  Ugh.

I'll not deny it and that was a nice touch with the earwigs, you utterly charming person.

Ed:  do you think it's time for The Bucket?

It just may be.  Possibly it's time to go all-out Jerry Lewis on her.  The only trouble with Jerry Lewis is every time he put a bucket over a door, he's the one who got soaked by it.  The French think Jerry Lewis is hilarious but, wtf, they piss in the streets, don't they.

Ed:  but they love jazz!

Yes, the jazz and the baguettes are why we keep the French around.

Ed:  but there's the south of France!

Yeah, right.  Try driving there in the Summer and, uh, welcome to Boston.

Pollyanna:  you're evil and I hate you!

Well, see, you thought you had nothing to do today.  Now you can sit around hating me.  You're welcome.

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