The Fourth of July is for the generals who make wars so I won't be attending ... but ... there are other ways to demonstrate one's patriotism in America although all of them amount to about the same because they result in egregiously shitty music. July of Fourth is synonymous with marching bands, right?
I rest my case.
When I hear the music for a funeral in a Catholic church, I'm hearing reverence and respect like I never hear for anything else in my life. Those songs are exquisitely beautiful and they're definite millennia class weepers. I don't share the Catholic reverence for anything related to death but I understand their respect for the concept.
But then I hear a marching band for the Fourth of July ...
Kee-rist. Someone turn off that infernal racket. Please ... puh-leeze!
That's not reverence, that's a fookin' migraine headache.
There's a better way ... an easier way ... to show your patriotism on this Fourth of July and you can do it for twenty bucks ... plus shipping.
Oh, you scoff that isn't real? Well, America is the same country which came up with Pope-on-a-Rope soap to commemorate the visit of one of the motley Popes before Francis.
Just in case you're not convinced, toddle off to Amazon and pick up one or more of these incomparable treasures, each of which comes equipped with three more cerebral lawn jobs so they can do to you what their meat people will do to America.
Presumably they listed Clinton first because of some misguided appreciation of the idea of 'ladies first but ... that ain't no lady, that's Hillary Clinton, and you can tell that by how much of the Fourth of July she spends licking her lips. Dunno about you but nothing turns me on so much as false glory.
I rest my case.
When I hear the music for a funeral in a Catholic church, I'm hearing reverence and respect like I never hear for anything else in my life. Those songs are exquisitely beautiful and they're definite millennia class weepers. I don't share the Catholic reverence for anything related to death but I understand their respect for the concept.
But then I hear a marching band for the Fourth of July ...
Kee-rist. Someone turn off that infernal racket. Please ... puh-leeze!
That's not reverence, that's a fookin' migraine headache.
There's a better way ... an easier way ... to show your patriotism on this Fourth of July and you can do it for twenty bucks ... plus shipping.
Oh, you scoff that isn't real? Well, America is the same country which came up with Pope-on-a-Rope soap to commemorate the visit of one of the motley Popes before Francis.
Just in case you're not convinced, toddle off to Amazon and pick up one or more of these incomparable treasures, each of which comes equipped with three more cerebral lawn jobs so they can do to you what their meat people will do to America.
Presumably they listed Clinton first because of some misguided appreciation of the idea of 'ladies first but ... that ain't no lady, that's Hillary Clinton, and you can tell that by how much of the Fourth of July she spends licking her lips. Dunno about you but nothing turns me on so much as false glory.
8 comments:
The 4th is for 7 years olds and lighting the sky with color.
Today I have chalk bombs and water balloons with food coloring as we add some foreign cultural to our celebration by including Holi into the 4th and bring some of that color from the sky to the ground.
The only war will be when the chalk bombs so quit ruining a fun day with politics
I'm not too worried about ruining anything for kids as I seriously doubt any seven-year-olds read it.
The colors sound outstanding but what is a chalk bomb??
Either cheesecloth filled with chalk powder and tied so it forms a ball.
Or thin tissue paper filled with a small amount of chalk and loosely tied.
Both allow the recipient to be covered in chalk. They are many versions.
Check out any video of Holi to see ot done right
Sounds more like India but they do a peach of a job of that in Seattle in some festival up there. They wind up with all kinds of colors on everything, particularly each other.
Holi is a Hindu festival
I've seen pics sometimes and it looks like a gas for them. I guess that's where Seattle got the idea as well.
Just checked it is not just Seattle It is 40 cities around the world The event is Tropicolor
A friend likes to do it up in Seattle and she would upload pics showing herself looking like the whole paint factory exploded.
It would be funny seeing Germans trying to grok it since the pragmatism with them is real and they have a harder time understanding doing things for no particular reason.
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