Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Sam Really Was America's Uncle

We hear all the time about George Washington being the father of America ... but ... we hardly hear anything about America's Uncles and Aunts.

Father George
Aunt Betty
Uncle Samuel
Uncle John
Uncle Charles (Chuck)
almost-Aunt Mildred

Oh, but there are more.

almost-Uncle Butler
Uncle Lawrence (Larry)
Uncle Augustine Jr. (Augie)
almost-Aunt Jane

The almost-Relatives either choked at the gate or not far past it.

Those are the fo' real Uncles and Aunts of America and maybe you wonder what become of those slackers but we're kind of wondering if Father George's parents ever did anything except make more Washingtons.

As you will discover, Uncle Sam was kind of shiftless.  He was married five times so he went through wives almost as fast as Henry VIII.  It looks like Uncle Sugar was sharing that sugar everywhere he possibly could.  (WIKI:  Samuel Washington)

I know all this is true because I heard it from George Carlin.

Now you know ... the rest of the story.

Yep, definitely stolen from Paul Harvey.  That was a time when you could listen to someone yapping on the squawk box and it would actually be interesting.

Radio shows weren't my time but I started listening to them on WVXU, alternative to GUCK which was the UC classical station.  It was exceptional for a 60s TV kid to hear those radio shows since many times they gave more of a story than the same thing in a TV show.  I still like to listen to them once in a while because ... only the Shadow knows.

This public service announcement regarding America's True Parentage is presented for the enlightenment of all and the curiosity of some as to what became of those slackers other than George.

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