We have been hearing about the Zombie Uprising for years but didn't believe we would ever see it except in the worst movie ever made or will ever be made in "World War Z" in which Brad Pitt showed he could be just as flat and lifeless as George Clooney although, thankfully, without that annoying grin which begs for a pie in the face.
We have also been trying to figure out what caused the aggressive obtusity and callous disregard for humanity in the neo-Democratic Party but we're only coming up with one answer now: zombies.
We go online and hear the same idiotic mantra over and over again:
TRUMP IS DANGEROUS
I DO WHAT I'M TOLD
I WANT TO EAT YOUR BRAIN
The evidence seems patently obvious and all points to the same conclusion: zombies.
The good thing for the Democrats is zombies don't have brains so they can't get rebellious and they will always be obedient. You never want to find yer zombies are getting rebellious, see.
(Ed: who do they obey when they eat my brain?)
Cthulhu, baby! They put pictures of women on Facebook but the real pic would show red eyes and tentacles coming out of her face.
(Ed: well, are they zombies or really demons?)
What fucking difference does it make, Dagwood! Either way they will eat yer brain. They already ate the brains of every liberal comedian so don't tell me they can't do it. Musikers held proud but comedians didn't.
(Ed: what about Katy Perry?)
I was talking about musicians.
(Ed: are the comedians all zombies too now?)
Take a look at Colbert and ask me again.
We have also been trying to figure out what caused the aggressive obtusity and callous disregard for humanity in the neo-Democratic Party but we're only coming up with one answer now: zombies.
We go online and hear the same idiotic mantra over and over again:
TRUMP IS DANGEROUS
I DO WHAT I'M TOLD
I WANT TO EAT YOUR BRAIN
The evidence seems patently obvious and all points to the same conclusion: zombies.
The good thing for the Democrats is zombies don't have brains so they can't get rebellious and they will always be obedient. You never want to find yer zombies are getting rebellious, see.
(Ed: who do they obey when they eat my brain?)
Cthulhu, baby! They put pictures of women on Facebook but the real pic would show red eyes and tentacles coming out of her face.
(Ed: well, are they zombies or really demons?)
What fucking difference does it make, Dagwood! Either way they will eat yer brain. They already ate the brains of every liberal comedian so don't tell me they can't do it. Musikers held proud but comedians didn't.
(Ed: what about Katy Perry?)
I was talking about musicians.
(Ed: are the comedians all zombies too now?)
Take a look at Colbert and ask me again.
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