Changes come quickly and these are the latest. Even so, things are surprisingly cool
After I have refused chemo and won't go to the E.R., I've wiped out most of the things the VA can do ... but not all of them. I got the word just now that Ms Kersa does not want to prescribe any anti-nausea meds and instead wants me to keep trying with Ensure / Boost. She has also set up the first consult for in-home hospice care.
Zen Yogi: is this the last dance with them really?
There's one more with Miss Kersa and Miss Rita but remotely since I need to send them flowers. Miss Kersa's suggestions are excellent and perfectly-dialed to the situation and I appreciate that it's a heartbreak inflicted on them by lackadaisical bums such as myself. They give so much and always do it cheerfully.
Note: I'm drinking some Ensure now and it goes well so far. Whoa, I even finished it and that's unusual for anything. That fact keeps this out of panic status for getting here at high speed.
Again since the previous may have been missed, I would love to see ALL of you since I believe far more good will come from that than anything else and likely more for you than you may realize.
For any pilgrimages, this confirms I will be here. The answer VA gave was the best they could have given since it won't prevent any visits nor conflict with them. Success with Ensure, assuming that stays constant is the best bet to keep me in the game long enough to receive you. Were that not working, high levels of morphine would be inevitable and then I wouldn't be able to receive much of anything.
These are some hard jams, maybe hardest of all in life, and I know deeply that seeing a crash is worse than being in it. I've been in enough of them to know that implicitly.
After Barbie, one among us said it gets a bit easier with each succeeding exit but that wasn't my experience and if you ever believed a word I said, know I absolutely will not make it worse on you. Frasers always do best when one of us is fucked-up and I fully intend to live up to that even when I'm the one who is fucked-up.
Alex sometimes called me his No. 1 Son and that must have just brought oodles of delight to Doc. In any case, I am the eldest and I look to this as a proper turnover to Doc and all of you.
Zen Yogi: the eldest makes you the leader?
By the Scot ways, it definitely makes me the leader but that won't work for a family who won't follow anyone.
Zen Yogi: do you know the Scot ways?
Not that well but The Raven could probably quote them word for word.
Zen Yogi: are you leading now?
To the best of my ability, yes. As the Eldest, I always figured I would croak first but Barbie fooled me. It's an opportunity to show you death with dignity when it has mostly been by surprise or at least a partial surprise previously.
There's a possibility of Ithaka going for another million hits and that could come if I turn it over to The Raven. We did type talk about it this morning and I told him I would think about it since at first I wondered how can that work. He wouldn't do it the same way nor does he necessarily believe the same things but he does know about dreaming big and it was a surprise to me but he told me I taught him that. He loves to write and that's mandatory for a blog.
It's not for me to control the things he may write nor set any Silas Style Sheet for the way they should be written. He goes his own way since that's how Frasers do it too.
There was no way Ithaka would have been scratched but it would have gone dormant for updates. Turning it over would be almost effortless since he will only need the password and for me to set him up as an admin. Bingo, he's the new Silas.
The Raven: incorrecto, Silas, since I am the Once and Future Raven.
Indeed you are, mate. I believe I've thought about it sufficiently since this morning and turning it over to The Raven would be a splendid idea.
After I have refused chemo and won't go to the E.R., I've wiped out most of the things the VA can do ... but not all of them. I got the word just now that Ms Kersa does not want to prescribe any anti-nausea meds and instead wants me to keep trying with Ensure / Boost. She has also set up the first consult for in-home hospice care.
Zen Yogi: is this the last dance with them really?
There's one more with Miss Kersa and Miss Rita but remotely since I need to send them flowers. Miss Kersa's suggestions are excellent and perfectly-dialed to the situation and I appreciate that it's a heartbreak inflicted on them by lackadaisical bums such as myself. They give so much and always do it cheerfully.
Note: I'm drinking some Ensure now and it goes well so far. Whoa, I even finished it and that's unusual for anything. That fact keeps this out of panic status for getting here at high speed.
Again since the previous may have been missed, I would love to see ALL of you since I believe far more good will come from that than anything else and likely more for you than you may realize.
For any pilgrimages, this confirms I will be here. The answer VA gave was the best they could have given since it won't prevent any visits nor conflict with them. Success with Ensure, assuming that stays constant is the best bet to keep me in the game long enough to receive you. Were that not working, high levels of morphine would be inevitable and then I wouldn't be able to receive much of anything.
These are some hard jams, maybe hardest of all in life, and I know deeply that seeing a crash is worse than being in it. I've been in enough of them to know that implicitly.
After Barbie, one among us said it gets a bit easier with each succeeding exit but that wasn't my experience and if you ever believed a word I said, know I absolutely will not make it worse on you. Frasers always do best when one of us is fucked-up and I fully intend to live up to that even when I'm the one who is fucked-up.
Alex sometimes called me his No. 1 Son and that must have just brought oodles of delight to Doc. In any case, I am the eldest and I look to this as a proper turnover to Doc and all of you.
Zen Yogi: the eldest makes you the leader?
By the Scot ways, it definitely makes me the leader but that won't work for a family who won't follow anyone.
Zen Yogi: do you know the Scot ways?
Not that well but The Raven could probably quote them word for word.
Zen Yogi: are you leading now?
To the best of my ability, yes. As the Eldest, I always figured I would croak first but Barbie fooled me. It's an opportunity to show you death with dignity when it has mostly been by surprise or at least a partial surprise previously.
There's a possibility of Ithaka going for another million hits and that could come if I turn it over to The Raven. We did type talk about it this morning and I told him I would think about it since at first I wondered how can that work. He wouldn't do it the same way nor does he necessarily believe the same things but he does know about dreaming big and it was a surprise to me but he told me I taught him that. He loves to write and that's mandatory for a blog.
It's not for me to control the things he may write nor set any Silas Style Sheet for the way they should be written. He goes his own way since that's how Frasers do it too.
There was no way Ithaka would have been scratched but it would have gone dormant for updates. Turning it over would be almost effortless since he will only need the password and for me to set him up as an admin. Bingo, he's the new Silas.
The Raven: incorrecto, Silas, since I am the Once and Future Raven.
Indeed you are, mate. I believe I've thought about it sufficiently since this morning and turning it over to The Raven would be a splendid idea.
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