After further review of the debut of new and improved Reverend Silas Theology Sasquatch, we of the Ministry of the Internet have decided he is truthful ... and boring as paint.
Therefore ... God has told us to bring back the T in Silas T Sasquatch by bringing back Texas.
Why does the Ten-Dollar Flat-Rate Soul Saving Paradigm exist?
Well, I'll tell you why it exists. I show you God and save your soul. That's not a hard thing so there's a flat rate of ten dollars for the save. The reason the paradigm ...
Hold it, hold it ... just a minute. For y'all in Texas, a paradigm is something what ain't a gun or a horse and you can't screw it or eat it. That's a paradigm. (I'd be crying if Miss Mona said that)
So the reason the paradigm exists is once you get your soul saved, it doesn't work like a fuckin' student loan from college and you have to pay for your new soul for the rest of your miserable life.
God said specifically it pisses him off that he gives souls away for free and then these guys in hats make money on the after-market. He's ok with the flat-rate soul saving as otherwise you'll be wretched sinners who will wander around in the dark where you will probably fall into a pit and be eaten by a grue. So, he's ok with that. Souls on a payment plan. Not good.
The good Reverend already he knows he has God right here on the Vocalist LiveFX but there was a sudden epiphany just now when he realized that means he has Satan on there as well. We have smoke. We have lasers. We have fookin' hellfire. A bit of programming will keep the lights to shades of red. Fire red lasers into smoke and it will be as satanic as Koch Brothers prayer meeting.
Maybe Satan needs to tell Sasquatch what he's going to do to him if he ever catches him. Anything more on what could be done with that needs to wait until it happens.
There will be no threat to anyone's belief in God. Maybe it's silly to keep posting the disclaimer.
Therefore ... God has told us to bring back the T in Silas T Sasquatch by bringing back Texas.
Why does the Ten-Dollar Flat-Rate Soul Saving Paradigm exist?
Well, I'll tell you why it exists. I show you God and save your soul. That's not a hard thing so there's a flat rate of ten dollars for the save. The reason the paradigm ...
Hold it, hold it ... just a minute. For y'all in Texas, a paradigm is something what ain't a gun or a horse and you can't screw it or eat it. That's a paradigm. (I'd be crying if Miss Mona said that)
So the reason the paradigm exists is once you get your soul saved, it doesn't work like a fuckin' student loan from college and you have to pay for your new soul for the rest of your miserable life.
God said specifically it pisses him off that he gives souls away for free and then these guys in hats make money on the after-market. He's ok with the flat-rate soul saving as otherwise you'll be wretched sinners who will wander around in the dark where you will probably fall into a pit and be eaten by a grue. So, he's ok with that. Souls on a payment plan. Not good.
The good Reverend already he knows he has God right here on the Vocalist LiveFX but there was a sudden epiphany just now when he realized that means he has Satan on there as well. We have smoke. We have lasers. We have fookin' hellfire. A bit of programming will keep the lights to shades of red. Fire red lasers into smoke and it will be as satanic as Koch Brothers prayer meeting.
Maybe Satan needs to tell Sasquatch what he's going to do to him if he ever catches him. Anything more on what could be done with that needs to wait until it happens.
There will be no threat to anyone's belief in God. Maybe it's silly to keep posting the disclaimer.
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