Plenty of drama of late and it didn't stop, I just stopped saying anything about because no-one needs a play-by-play.
The big punchline today is even VA, who actually gives a rip about what becomes of you, is supporting the belief in significant problems still being caused by withdrawal from Klonopin / Clonazepam. Kersa confirmed material I have read online about substantial problems with anything from that line of pharmaceuticals (e.g. Valium, Klonopin, etc). Important to that is the knowledge you absolutely don't stop them quickly. The situation is known generically as a 'benzo crisis' or 'benzo problem,' etc. Generically means across the country rather summing up my own.
Note: this is the biggest reason for the post. I'm not stable and that doesn't mean violent but it does mean sound becomes like what reefer does to it ... but bouncing it off the Moon with laser beams first. It's going to be kind of weird for a while but, that's ok, as I do weird a whole lot better than I do passive.
Additional meds were prescribed to deal with ... stand back for the I Ain't Even Believin' This ... the meds are to deal with anxiety. She assured me specifically and this was my highest interest in medication some while: these are not habit-forming and you can stop at any time if any troubles.
My response was, hey, hey, what does anxiety have to do with it. I've jumped out of aircraft, crashed who knows how many motorcycles ...
She says, no, no, not the same thing.
She's right too as I would do such things but I would still be afraid of them. That doesn't back-door me into my definition of courage which is when you're afraid of something, you do it anyway. That alone is not sufficient as there has to be some positive purpose to it, etc. There was a purpose as such things bestow an enormous appreciation of life but that's not enough to call it courage for doing them. Complicated word so that will do it for now.
So, ok, there's an anxiety situation and I told her I would take her lead on what to do about it.
Maggie assured me specifically and this was my highest interest in medication in some while: these are not habit-forming and you can stop at any time if any troubles. (She said it's ok to call her Maggie but I've never been comfortable addressing medical people in that way)
She said Paxil was a possibility and that one I refused immediately. It's the same as putting my head in a bucket. If I do that, I'm already dead. This was not a debate but rather her suggestions of possibilities. Paxil has been tried before and it did not go well. No harm was done but, after some time, you find you're not doing all that much. That's Paxil and it will give you passivity ... if you should feel you actually need that.
Paxil and drugs and other of these serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SRI) are known popularly as 'pecker wreckers' and do believe this chemical is more destructive sexually than bouncing my balls off the gas tank in the last big crash. That's not even a tiny exaggeration. This stuff is bad news. (Zoloft is another in this category, also Prozac and others) The shrinks say, regarding any pecker wreckery, 'oh sure, we have stuff for that.' (Just another little pill, right)
Note: I have zero interest in Scientology as any generic ban on anything is worthless to me, it's just another form of tyranny. If any drug is effective to purpose then it may be suitable for my needs. However, if a drug takes more than it gives then it is a bad drug. Paxil is a bad drug.
(Ed: what does this have to do with poofery?)
Nothin'. Tabloid title. I'm such a slut and I'm so ashamed.
Follow-up is some type of nuclear test to look for heart blockage, probably not the good side of 50/50, and biopsy skin cancer. The latter has been worrying me the most as I've had my share of basal cell carcinoma and the rest of the family should damn sure be seeing dermatologists. Growing up in Australia means we were fried before we ever even left the gate. That's not a problem, it only means being attentive. Most of the time, they can just nick off the basal cell stuff and you're back on the street again. Melanoma, I gather, is what kills Jimmy Carter right now.
Note: I told them of the problem at the JPS hospital and they weren't interested. I've had multiple skin cancers, I know what they look like.
This isn't melodrama but reality ... which winds up being melodrama most of the fookin' time anyway. That's where it stands and no more to dwell in it. There is some calming effect from VA moving toward discovering what happens rather than 'no insurance, get the fuck out' (i.e. last week). They gave me one 325 mg tab of aspirin and a shot of saline (dead serious). All fixed, get out.
I asked Kersa if a lot of the ones she sees are broke and she told me almost all of them, that's why they come to VA. If you really want to understand 'be all you can be' then you seriously need to go out to VA as you never will otherwise.
As mentioned by one much wiser than I (i.e. just about anyone):
Some don't even believe the problem exists or it's only wastrel welfare bums or some type of cartoon thinking of that nature. The problem is real. I'm living it.
The big punchline today is even VA, who actually gives a rip about what becomes of you, is supporting the belief in significant problems still being caused by withdrawal from Klonopin / Clonazepam. Kersa confirmed material I have read online about substantial problems with anything from that line of pharmaceuticals (e.g. Valium, Klonopin, etc). Important to that is the knowledge you absolutely don't stop them quickly. The situation is known generically as a 'benzo crisis' or 'benzo problem,' etc. Generically means across the country rather summing up my own.
Note: this is the biggest reason for the post. I'm not stable and that doesn't mean violent but it does mean sound becomes like what reefer does to it ... but bouncing it off the Moon with laser beams first. It's going to be kind of weird for a while but, that's ok, as I do weird a whole lot better than I do passive.
Additional meds were prescribed to deal with ... stand back for the I Ain't Even Believin' This ... the meds are to deal with anxiety. She assured me specifically and this was my highest interest in medication some while: these are not habit-forming and you can stop at any time if any troubles.
My response was, hey, hey, what does anxiety have to do with it. I've jumped out of aircraft, crashed who knows how many motorcycles ...
She says, no, no, not the same thing.
She's right too as I would do such things but I would still be afraid of them. That doesn't back-door me into my definition of courage which is when you're afraid of something, you do it anyway. That alone is not sufficient as there has to be some positive purpose to it, etc. There was a purpose as such things bestow an enormous appreciation of life but that's not enough to call it courage for doing them. Complicated word so that will do it for now.
So, ok, there's an anxiety situation and I told her I would take her lead on what to do about it.
Maggie assured me specifically and this was my highest interest in medication in some while: these are not habit-forming and you can stop at any time if any troubles. (She said it's ok to call her Maggie but I've never been comfortable addressing medical people in that way)
She said Paxil was a possibility and that one I refused immediately. It's the same as putting my head in a bucket. If I do that, I'm already dead. This was not a debate but rather her suggestions of possibilities. Paxil has been tried before and it did not go well. No harm was done but, after some time, you find you're not doing all that much. That's Paxil and it will give you passivity ... if you should feel you actually need that.
Paxil and drugs and other of these serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SRI) are known popularly as 'pecker wreckers' and do believe this chemical is more destructive sexually than bouncing my balls off the gas tank in the last big crash. That's not even a tiny exaggeration. This stuff is bad news. (Zoloft is another in this category, also Prozac and others) The shrinks say, regarding any pecker wreckery, 'oh sure, we have stuff for that.' (Just another little pill, right)
Note: I have zero interest in Scientology as any generic ban on anything is worthless to me, it's just another form of tyranny. If any drug is effective to purpose then it may be suitable for my needs. However, if a drug takes more than it gives then it is a bad drug. Paxil is a bad drug.
(Ed: what does this have to do with poofery?)
Nothin'. Tabloid title. I'm such a slut and I'm so ashamed.
Follow-up is some type of nuclear test to look for heart blockage, probably not the good side of 50/50, and biopsy skin cancer. The latter has been worrying me the most as I've had my share of basal cell carcinoma and the rest of the family should damn sure be seeing dermatologists. Growing up in Australia means we were fried before we ever even left the gate. That's not a problem, it only means being attentive. Most of the time, they can just nick off the basal cell stuff and you're back on the street again. Melanoma, I gather, is what kills Jimmy Carter right now.
Note: I told them of the problem at the JPS hospital and they weren't interested. I've had multiple skin cancers, I know what they look like.
This isn't melodrama but reality ... which winds up being melodrama most of the fookin' time anyway. That's where it stands and no more to dwell in it. There is some calming effect from VA moving toward discovering what happens rather than 'no insurance, get the fuck out' (i.e. last week). They gave me one 325 mg tab of aspirin and a shot of saline (dead serious). All fixed, get out.
I asked Kersa if a lot of the ones she sees are broke and she told me almost all of them, that's why they come to VA. If you really want to understand 'be all you can be' then you seriously need to go out to VA as you never will otherwise.
Veterans Administration motto: All gave some / Some gave all
Tea Party motto: we give nothing.
As mentioned by one much wiser than I (i.e. just about anyone):
Some don't even believe the problem exists or it's only wastrel welfare bums or some type of cartoon thinking of that nature. The problem is real. I'm living it.
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