Disclaimer: this is straight-up writing of active lung cancer in me but nothing in the #Blotto set of articles has been written with thoughts of trying to shock or disturb. I am using in-home hospice and that's the best circumstance I could hope relative to being in a hospice clinic or, worst of all, to be admitted into a hospital.
The #Blotto situation absolutely sucks at this stage and that probably hasn't been such a tough thing to discern. That makes things so difficult for Yevette but she is being such a trouper about it. As from the beginning, that makes it all the more important to keep the focus anywhere but the immediate hellhole of, wow, this really sucks.
Note: ML shows a similar toughness since she knows the circumstance well. She can't see it happening as currently rips the guts out of Yevette but ML has a nurse for years and she knows how it goes. Yevette has it right up in her face and I'm constantly apologizing to her for inflicting this on her.
One of the little games for an alternative focus is in finding a #Photography set you will dig since that's hit or miss each day and I don't know the variable. When one of those turns into a big boomer, it becomes a fascination as to, hmm, I wonder what you found different. There must be something of that curiosity in you as well or people wouldn't read them so that makes a peach of an alternative focus.
The need for an alternative focus in me or anyone is what leads to "The Shawshank Rebellion" when it gives such extraordinary portraits of how beautiful people can be rather than the incessant snapshots of people elsewhere who are not being beautiful at all, usually for political reasons. Shawshank brings hardly any politics and it's all the better without.
Maybe it's interesting to you that the Shawshank Penitentiary was actually the Ohio State Reformatory.
This aspect of the Reformatory was torn down but massive cell blocks still remain and they're said to be in much better condition than any in the movie. (WIKI: The Shawshank Redemption)
Note: Clancy Brown plays the Captain of the Guards as a massively violent prick and you have probably seen him in one movie or another playing that kind of role since he really seems to dig them. He was the Drill Sergeant in "Starship Troopers," another tough guy type of role.
Zen Yogi: someone screwed with the colors of those trees
Why not bump up the color in them, mate, since it's the only color anyone will see in a prison movie.
The medical situation was mostly in the toilet because I figured nothing was really stopping the pain so, fuck it, why do it and consequently I abandoned the morphine and the ganja. That continued from yesterday sometime as it's far more difficult to get back to the regimen than it is to do the Nasty Dance to try to keep it stable in the first place.
That wasn't one of the best command decisions I ever made.
Around eight this morning I did take the dose of morphine and I had no idea if it would start me vomiting again but I did it anyway. It still didn't entirely kill the pain but I did sleep until not so long ago. That's when I did smoke some ganja as I awakened still with the feeling I need to get all the nastiness in me out of me. The ganja was remarkably good for quelling that so here we are.
There are no questions in this since I'm completely fucked and it won't get better. You know that already. However, the palliation is real so long as it's the right combination and morphine is not enough by itself.
When the combination is right it frees me to find views as with "The Shawshank Redemption" and then all of us get something positive out of it since Tim Robbins so strongly brings a message of Hope.
It also allows me to take a little of the beloved Pepsi Cola sometimes too and that's a prime goodness.
Much love to you all.
The #Blotto situation absolutely sucks at this stage and that probably hasn't been such a tough thing to discern. That makes things so difficult for Yevette but she is being such a trouper about it. As from the beginning, that makes it all the more important to keep the focus anywhere but the immediate hellhole of, wow, this really sucks.
Note: ML shows a similar toughness since she knows the circumstance well. She can't see it happening as currently rips the guts out of Yevette but ML has a nurse for years and she knows how it goes. Yevette has it right up in her face and I'm constantly apologizing to her for inflicting this on her.
One of the little games for an alternative focus is in finding a #Photography set you will dig since that's hit or miss each day and I don't know the variable. When one of those turns into a big boomer, it becomes a fascination as to, hmm, I wonder what you found different. There must be something of that curiosity in you as well or people wouldn't read them so that makes a peach of an alternative focus.
The need for an alternative focus in me or anyone is what leads to "The Shawshank Rebellion" when it gives such extraordinary portraits of how beautiful people can be rather than the incessant snapshots of people elsewhere who are not being beautiful at all, usually for political reasons. Shawshank brings hardly any politics and it's all the better without.
Maybe it's interesting to you that the Shawshank Penitentiary was actually the Ohio State Reformatory.
This aspect of the Reformatory was torn down but massive cell blocks still remain and they're said to be in much better condition than any in the movie. (WIKI: The Shawshank Redemption)
Note: Clancy Brown plays the Captain of the Guards as a massively violent prick and you have probably seen him in one movie or another playing that kind of role since he really seems to dig them. He was the Drill Sergeant in "Starship Troopers," another tough guy type of role.
Zen Yogi: someone screwed with the colors of those trees
Why not bump up the color in them, mate, since it's the only color anyone will see in a prison movie.
The medical situation was mostly in the toilet because I figured nothing was really stopping the pain so, fuck it, why do it and consequently I abandoned the morphine and the ganja. That continued from yesterday sometime as it's far more difficult to get back to the regimen than it is to do the Nasty Dance to try to keep it stable in the first place.
That wasn't one of the best command decisions I ever made.
Around eight this morning I did take the dose of morphine and I had no idea if it would start me vomiting again but I did it anyway. It still didn't entirely kill the pain but I did sleep until not so long ago. That's when I did smoke some ganja as I awakened still with the feeling I need to get all the nastiness in me out of me. The ganja was remarkably good for quelling that so here we are.
There are no questions in this since I'm completely fucked and it won't get better. You know that already. However, the palliation is real so long as it's the right combination and morphine is not enough by itself.
When the combination is right it frees me to find views as with "The Shawshank Redemption" and then all of us get something positive out of it since Tim Robbins so strongly brings a message of Hope.
It also allows me to take a little of the beloved Pepsi Cola sometimes too and that's a prime goodness.
Much love to you all.
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