No way to make comedy out of the bureaucratic idiocy of the Texas Department of Motor Vehicles. The visit failed because I do not have a drivers license from Texas and therefore I'm a terrorist. You may want to scroll down as you may find some comical stuff that way.
Drivers License
The application for a drivers license is a two-page document and one says, 'answer the seven questions below for the confidential use of the department.' One of them asks if you have diabetes and I've known many with diabetes but it didn't limit their driving ability so why do they even ask. Moreover, why do they insult me by telling me they will keep it confidential. Texas couldn't even keep the design plans for the F-35 fighter aircraft confidential.
Note: Lockheed Martin is just down the road from here. You might wish to consider other options if they ever offer a security package to anyone.
Some say Texas makes it such an onerous process so they can exclude non-white people from voting. Unknown if it has that effect but I have no more reason to trust the state than I ever did because their paranoia that everyone is a terrorist is a form of government terrorism to intimidate people. American cops killed almost a thousand civilians this year for a loss of thirty cops. If they were Muslims, the White House would be launching drone strikes against them.
Yevette asked before we left if I wanted to pretty myself up for the pic but I told her there's something fundamentally wrong with you if you can put up with DMV bullshit anywhere and still pose for a good pic.
So, the visit was a fail but part of it was asking snidely if a passport is sufficient documentation of my identity. The clerk said 'yes' ... plus I need these other things.
Yes, Texas makes it harder to get a drivers license than it is to get a passport. Unbelievable what these statist drones will do ... but it shouldn't be such a surprise after the Kim Davis debacle.
So, I'll indicate on the application I'm a citizen and then show her my UK passport. That should get her li'l clerk head spinning and then I'll show her my US passport. That should be enough to get her puking green stuff. "Your mother sucks cocks in helllllll!"
Note: thanks to Linda Blair for the ad lib (i.e. "The Exorcist")
(Ed: is that true about the blood test?)
Nope, not yet. They do require you to be fingerprinted and to have an in-state reference. Yah, just to drive a car.
The Rest of the Story
There was some cool stuff, tho. The anger doesn't last long with me because it's too much baggage to carry about. Yevette needed some smokes so, for once, I knew how to find something in Fort Worth but she did not.
Girl, what you need is Tobacco Town.
(Ed: you're serious? The store is called Tobacco Town?)
Relax, it could have been Cowtown Tobacco since they like that name as well ... just like Cincinnatians like to call their town Porkopolis.
There's so much hog love in Cincinnati that they even put golden flying pigs on the top of displays on the Cincinnati Riverfront.
Oh? You don't believe me?? Well ...
I invite your attention to the pic.
So, maybe the flying pig isn't exactly golden. It looks like it may be a symbol of the flying pig emerging from the smokestack of one of the many riverboats which stopped in Cincinnati ... but that's not how the pigs got there since Cincinnati, Chicago, etc were and still are major rail centers.
So, lighten up on Tobacco Town and sure it's an incredibly inelegant name but looking to Texas for style is an unusual choice and would make you the first.
The interesting part about Tobacco Town, other than Yevette getting her smokes, was they had a few Halloween costumes on-sale. One of them was a monk outfit so I had to inquire as that would be a great prop for the stiff I need on the porch to wave people inside the Rockhouse for Sanctuary when "The End of the World in Fort Worth" comes. The outfit was less than ten bucks so what should I do.
Well ... the monk outfit is now the only item of formalwear in the Silas wardrobe.
Drivers License
The application for a drivers license is a two-page document and one says, 'answer the seven questions below for the confidential use of the department.' One of them asks if you have diabetes and I've known many with diabetes but it didn't limit their driving ability so why do they even ask. Moreover, why do they insult me by telling me they will keep it confidential. Texas couldn't even keep the design plans for the F-35 fighter aircraft confidential.
Note: Lockheed Martin is just down the road from here. You might wish to consider other options if they ever offer a security package to anyone.
Some say Texas makes it such an onerous process so they can exclude non-white people from voting. Unknown if it has that effect but I have no more reason to trust the state than I ever did because their paranoia that everyone is a terrorist is a form of government terrorism to intimidate people. American cops killed almost a thousand civilians this year for a loss of thirty cops. If they were Muslims, the White House would be launching drone strikes against them.
Yevette asked before we left if I wanted to pretty myself up for the pic but I told her there's something fundamentally wrong with you if you can put up with DMV bullshit anywhere and still pose for a good pic.
So, the visit was a fail but part of it was asking snidely if a passport is sufficient documentation of my identity. The clerk said 'yes' ... plus I need these other things.
Yes, Texas makes it harder to get a drivers license than it is to get a passport. Unbelievable what these statist drones will do ... but it shouldn't be such a surprise after the Kim Davis debacle.
So, I'll indicate on the application I'm a citizen and then show her my UK passport. That should get her li'l clerk head spinning and then I'll show her my US passport. That should be enough to get her puking green stuff. "Your mother sucks cocks in helllllll!"
Note: thanks to Linda Blair for the ad lib (i.e. "The Exorcist")
(Ed: is that true about the blood test?)
Nope, not yet. They do require you to be fingerprinted and to have an in-state reference. Yah, just to drive a car.
The Rest of the Story
There was some cool stuff, tho. The anger doesn't last long with me because it's too much baggage to carry about. Yevette needed some smokes so, for once, I knew how to find something in Fort Worth but she did not.
Girl, what you need is Tobacco Town.
(Ed: you're serious? The store is called Tobacco Town?)
Relax, it could have been Cowtown Tobacco since they like that name as well ... just like Cincinnatians like to call their town Porkopolis.
There's so much hog love in Cincinnati that they even put golden flying pigs on the top of displays on the Cincinnati Riverfront.
Oh? You don't believe me?? Well ...
I invite your attention to the pic.
So, maybe the flying pig isn't exactly golden. It looks like it may be a symbol of the flying pig emerging from the smokestack of one of the many riverboats which stopped in Cincinnati ... but that's not how the pigs got there since Cincinnati, Chicago, etc were and still are major rail centers.
So, lighten up on Tobacco Town and sure it's an incredibly inelegant name but looking to Texas for style is an unusual choice and would make you the first.
The interesting part about Tobacco Town, other than Yevette getting her smokes, was they had a few Halloween costumes on-sale. One of them was a monk outfit so I had to inquire as that would be a great prop for the stiff I need on the porch to wave people inside the Rockhouse for Sanctuary when "The End of the World in Fort Worth" comes. The outfit was less than ten bucks so what should I do.
Well ... the monk outfit is now the only item of formalwear in the Silas wardrobe.
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