Thursday, April 6, 2017

And That's When I Met the Ninja Mama

So I sez to her, "There wuz a time when I wuz more stable and didn't wobble all over the place.  I was riding motorcycles for years."

So she sez, "So wuz I.  Mine was a 900 Ninja (which maybe means one of those Blue Meanie Kawasaki 900s)."

The Ninja Mama is a woman and she is black so she definitely doesn't fit the FBI Profile for someone who rides a 900 Kaw.


It was cool talking to her and we started talking in the first place since I thought she was the doctor.  I didn't know Dr Mayberry so maybe.  When the Ninja Mama started talking about how she was once tooling around on big bikes, that scratched the doctor theory but all was cool anyway.

She said she was afraid of taking the bike onto the Interstate and, if you have seen Texans in their pickup trucks and monster SUVs, you will know why.  She said she needed speed to keep the motor cool or that was her theory and she said the motor was overheating a lot so she unloaded it.

I didn't try to analyze that as I was diggin' it that she ever threw a leg over a big bike in the first place.


I'm really not sure how fast a scoot needs to be going before it's getting enough airflow to keep the motor cool and not making so much heat that cooling it is impossible.  Ninja Mama's theory sounds kind of odd I but find the world is full of a whole lot of odd these days.

In fact, I thought the problem with the Blue Meanies was the middle cylinder wasn't getting enough airflow at high speed.  She probably means some other bike since no-one called that model a Ninja.

I liked her as she was cool and the other nurses were a much more staid lot.  They were highly professional and competent but they didn't bring much zing while Ninja Mama was loaded with it and was great fun.


I'm a much more affable fellow in real than Ithaka would ever clue you.  Assuredly just as shocking as when George Carlin said it is the fact I do like people.

Watson:  you just don't like pricks

See.  Simple, isn't it.


For example, one of the reasons I loathe football players is a couple of huge ones were walking about downtown Cincinnati accompanied, presumably, by their high-priced hookers.  I was headed the other way with the Lovely Ms Nancy and, as we passed, one of them said, "Good evening, girls."

The courage just stuns, doesn't it.

You haven't heard about the Lovely Ms Nancy before since this was some time in my early twenties and back then I found I could destroy relationships far faster than I could later.

The Lovely Ms Nancy knew how testosterone works and was saying, be cool, be cool; they're just Neanderthals and mean nothing.

Still you want to rip the Neanderthal's lungs out, don't you, mates.  The thug gets the score just from eliciting that so, fuck it, distribute my contempt equitably over all of them because surely all football players are like that.

Note:  don't spit out an answer too fast, Dagwood.  Some football players have a PhD.  The gorillas on the street in Cincinnati were probably just blockers, however.  The quarterback is the one most likely to be packing a heavy degree.


Ninja Mama
What's got into you
There was that need for speed
and you got all kinds of blue

Kawasaki blue, that is
The fastest kind
Faster than a scalded dog
with a snootful of moonshine



That's not a 900 but it was the closest I could find to the original Blue Meanie.  The people who chose them when they first came out were usually complete lunatics so I guess many of those bikes didn't go the distance.

The crazy thing about them is they had two-stroke motors so they had an insane sound and you always knew when one was coming.

Correction:  Lotho advised the idea of a 900 Kaw is something I conflated from my mishmash of motorcycle history since the 750 was the actual Blue Meanie.


Ninja Mama
What's got into you

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

The original Blue Meanie was a 750.
It was the H2 750 two stroke air cooled demon.
It came out mid 70s The Ninja came out about 10 or so years later aa 900cc. I hand to chose between it and the FJ1200. The FJ was a very solid powerful bike but the Ninja would eat it for lunch in the twisted.

Anonymous said...

There must have been a mechanical issue with the bike as the Ninja is a liquid cooled bike

Unknown said...

Ah, ok. Sorry about bogus reporting but not such a terrible miss. The two-stroke aspect was the crazy part and I remember how that got people buzzing.

When it gets to pushing corners that hard on two wheels, it's best if the Silas kicks out to pretend this is the Isle of Man since watching will be just fine and definitely prevents personal deadness.