Saturday, October 29, 2016

That's Enough Serious, Let's Start a War

A missile was fired yesterday, ostensibly by Yemeni rebels, and the target was Mecca but Saudis intercepted it and prevented damage to the holiest of Islamic holy holiness.  (RT:  Saudi Arabia intercepts ballistic missile fired by Yemeni rebels into holy Mecca – report)

It would have been so much more interesting if the rocket hit Mecca and blew it all to hell and tell me you weren't hoping that too.  Remember, God is watching ... or Allah ... or somebody.

Even before the bricks stopped falling back to the ground, Saudi Arabia would send America to attack Iran.  The Iranians would already be pissed off because the Saudis didn't protect Mecca any better than that so we have all the vital ingredients for armed combat.

This time President Hillary the Imperious would tell the Saudis to fuck off because she will know she can push a whole lot more weapons when she's pushing them to both sides and maybe she can cop a deal with Putin so he gets a piece of the sales action as well.


Don't worry, Vlad, boobie.  It won't get out of the Middle East.  It will be like World Wrestling Federation but they will use our missiles to blow their own shit up.  How can we get a better deal than that?

Putin:  Da, da.  Where is vodka?

Tell you what, Vlad.  Think of it as the best field test we could possibly find for our military kit and our people don't even get dead behind it plus we get paid.  Let's play Let's Make a Deal.

Putin:  Da.  More vodka.  You drink, woman.  Important for ugly woman for to drink.

Why?

Drunk woman feel pretty.  Drunk man look good.  Love happen.  Or sex.  All good.

Putin:  More vodka, please.

I see.  Do you want me now?

Putin:  Nyet, Nyet!  Meeting over.

I see.

Somebody kill him.  (No-one moves.  She leaves in a huff.)


At the same time, Israel would connect the unholiest of unholy alliances as they hook with Saudis to fuck up Iran.  Netanyahu has such a hard on for Iran after Ahmedinijad said something maybe ten years ago.  Mind like an elephant in that man.  Too bad the elephant mostly only thinks of squirting his hose at people.

Screech from the crowd:  that's SO anti-Semitic!

Fuck you.  What's so Semitic about sending attack helicopters to waste Palestinian children and blow up housing in the occupied territories.  You can't get any more Fascist than that without the official Fascist Guidebook.

Screech from the crowd:  we have that already!

We suspected as much.


The Palestinian situation makes it perfect since the Israelis would be egging the Saudis on toward greater destruction of Iran along with (sob) greater personal injury to themselves while at the same time the Palestinians will be attacking the Israelis as payback for all the shit the Israelis do in Palestine and the Saudis would be helping them do it.  They give us a full circle of diplomatic incompetence.  It's ingenious.


Meanwhile, Afghanistan and Pakistan would advance from the East since they're mostly Sunnis as well so it looks like Iran will be entirely fucked.

But that's when China gets into it and let's not forget whatever our friends in North Korea may manage to deliver.  It's glorious theater-wide destruction.


It would be end-to-end mayhem in the Middle East and they don't have any kind of a navy or significant air forces for troop transport.  They won't get out so it will be like a Middle East roller derby with bombs and they can't waste anyone else except each other nor will they want to do that because even the Satanic Americans aren't as bad as those soulless Saudi bastards, those Sunni pigs.  We must waste them to burn their bodies to join their long-lost souls.

Such magnificent chaos since no-one kills like the righteous and they will get down to some empire scale slaughter.  There hasn't been this much of a hot ticket since the Crusades.

Bring the whole family to watch.

No comments: