Amateurs get their joke news from the Rat Patrol (i.e. CNN, Fox, The Guardian) but we get our joke news from the professionals at the National Enquirer where they have a nine-page confession from Hillary Clinton's hitman. Deny it all you like and y'all will (i.e. but not Die Kaninchen) because that Clinton crew spends almost all its time denying one thing or another. Mostly that avoids the topic of campaign finance reform because Slick Willie doesn't want to kill the Golden Goose.
As an example of how far the delusion has spread, Stevie Nicks wants to sing for the Inauguration but Clinton will put her band in jail if anyone smokes reefer. Swing heil! (Ref: "Swing Kids" movie about resistance by the jazz kids in NAZI Germany)
If you know Men in Black then you know already the National Enquirer presents truth but most are not hip enough to see it.
We see Kim Kardashian is still pretending the robbery was not a publicity stunt. Of course, that's a code to declare the Lemagogians are still in-bound from Steatopygia, Planet of Enormous Backsides.
Note: steatopygia is real. Look it up. It's the perfect excuse for a fat ass since you can say, "I can't help it because I've got steatopygic genes."
Another note: I've known that word since school. Once you set your mind to vacuum, it sweeps up every piece of useless bullshit you ever encounter. There is no cure.
We're advised George Clooney is moving to Washington pick up a Senate seat the same way as Clinton. Naturally, this is an advisory of an impending attack by the warriors from Criscolalia where they're vicious but their primary weapon is smug goo which we're also advised can be repelled by critiquing his movies.
Sean Penn is embroiled in an Incest Horror but this one isn't code. It only means someone at the National Enquirer hates him and doesn't care about being sued.
We also see the proof no-one ever reads past the cover of the National Enquirer because here's an ad for how to lose thirty-eight pounds easily.
From the Clinton's Hit Man, Mr Fixit, we learn his shadowy 'black room' operation has been active since 1992 in dealing with the many affairs by the Clintons from paying them off or whatever was necessary. The 'black room' returned to the darkness in 2008 because Mr Fixit was disgusted with the Clintons and we don't even want to know what's so disgusting it repels a hit man but we're sure the Clintons are easily capable of it.
We love you, see. That's why we read the National Enquirer. We do this extra thing because our commitment is real. We want to provide the truth you so desperately seek.
(Ed: you are so full of bullshit!)
Do mean entirely full of bullshit?)
(Ed: yes)
Well, no, then. I'm not entirely full of bullshit. Just think of finding truth as playing Where's Waldo in a crap factory. How hard can it be?
As an example of how far the delusion has spread, Stevie Nicks wants to sing for the Inauguration but Clinton will put her band in jail if anyone smokes reefer. Swing heil! (Ref: "Swing Kids" movie about resistance by the jazz kids in NAZI Germany)
If you know Men in Black then you know already the National Enquirer presents truth but most are not hip enough to see it.
We see Kim Kardashian is still pretending the robbery was not a publicity stunt. Of course, that's a code to declare the Lemagogians are still in-bound from Steatopygia, Planet of Enormous Backsides.
Note: steatopygia is real. Look it up. It's the perfect excuse for a fat ass since you can say, "I can't help it because I've got steatopygic genes."
Another note: I've known that word since school. Once you set your mind to vacuum, it sweeps up every piece of useless bullshit you ever encounter. There is no cure.
We're advised George Clooney is moving to Washington pick up a Senate seat the same way as Clinton. Naturally, this is an advisory of an impending attack by the warriors from Criscolalia where they're vicious but their primary weapon is smug goo which we're also advised can be repelled by critiquing his movies.
Sean Penn is embroiled in an Incest Horror but this one isn't code. It only means someone at the National Enquirer hates him and doesn't care about being sued.
We also see the proof no-one ever reads past the cover of the National Enquirer because here's an ad for how to lose thirty-eight pounds easily.
From the Clinton's Hit Man, Mr Fixit, we learn his shadowy 'black room' operation has been active since 1992 in dealing with the many affairs by the Clintons from paying them off or whatever was necessary. The 'black room' returned to the darkness in 2008 because Mr Fixit was disgusted with the Clintons and we don't even want to know what's so disgusting it repels a hit man but we're sure the Clintons are easily capable of it.
We love you, see. That's why we read the National Enquirer. We do this extra thing because our commitment is real. We want to provide the truth you so desperately seek.
(Ed: you are so full of bullshit!)
Do mean entirely full of bullshit?)
(Ed: yes)
Well, no, then. I'm not entirely full of bullshit. Just think of finding truth as playing Where's Waldo in a crap factory. How hard can it be?
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