Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Nothing Much for Science this Day

Alligator Man was the only hit for the day and there's only Rat Patrol News after that.  Alligator Man is a much more interesting character, tho.


We only have a few questions from the Rat Patrol (CNN, Fox, Guardian):

- was the Chelsea / New Jersey attacker more of an incompetent than the Shoe Bomber?

Answer:  a tie according to Olympic judges


- who has killed most Americans this weekend, terrorists or cops?

Answer:  cops


- how many chiquitas have been interviewed on television while they talk about their friend, Hillary?

Answer:  too many to count


- how many Florida aquifers were polluted by a sinkhole which contaminated the state's water system?

Answer:  it only took one


- how many times did Obama stand up for American Indians this weekend?

Answer:  zero


- how many Michigan governors refused relief to the people of Flint after poisoning them with lead?

Answer:  Rick Snyder takes the death camp guard prize once again


- how many ways did America pretend this weekend the Democratic Party still exists?

Answer:  unknown.  Stopped paying attention and counting.


- when the hell is the John Oliver show coming back as there's no news of any kind without Last Week Tonight

Answer:  Unknown and remain desperate and weightless


Medical situation:  get a spinner with Shitty and Non-Shitty on it.  Probability is about even the spin will be accurate and the blood is back.  Fortunately, I'm still beautiful.

Ain't no-one ever seen me salivating over a salami but I have delighted in throwing gayness at my family and it was a riot with my ol' Dad.  He said something once which surprised me as how could he possibly have a concern anyone may perceive him as gay when he tows six kids behind him.  Since that thinking existed, there was only one answer:  take up embroidery.  He was bringing his female students around on a regular basis after that.

How about this one?  Oh, well, this one then?  No, how about this one??

Are you a fucking queer?

Well, no, but I do have a sense of humor about it and, tag, you're it.


(Ed:  what does this have to do with the news?)

If I may draw your attention to it momentarily, perhaps you could show me anything on the news which really is news.

As I was saying ...

the American Alligator hasn't changed in eight million years.

No comments: