Monday, October 3, 2016

The Zantorian Interstellar Pussywhipper Ray

It was the unfortunate providence of Fate which led the Earth into the path of the Zantorian Interstellar Pussywhipper Ray and, as nearly as scientists can determine, it happened sometime between 1985 and 1995.  Donald Trump said this was the same reason he lost so much money in Atlantic City in 1995 but this is science and he remains a sociopathic psychotic.

Since that time, American men turned into pussies.  There's nothing but shit on television and why?  Because you gave up the remote control, you fucking wimps.  Now every damn thing on the telly has to have one white one, a black one, an Asian one, a female one, a male one, a wheelchair one, and a transgender although how we tell which is the transgender isn't clear.  Maybe get someone from North Carolina to check.

It was sure a great swan dive after "On the Waterfront," huh, Champ (smirk).

"I coulda had class.  I coulda been a contenda."


There was one from "Dancing with the Average Stars" who was whining up and down about being regarded as average but, wtf, she is average.  If you want to be regarded like Sandra Bullock, maybe learn another language and start doing some sit-ups once in a while.  Consider developing acting skill.  That's a plus.

Kurt Vonnegut was right but Diana Moon Glampers doesn't come out to equalize people with a shotgun now, she uses social network horror instead.

My God, someone called me average.  How can I live with it.  What's the use in going on.  My life is ruined.

Piss off.


This country is pussy-whipped like they all run around in uniforms for Campfire Girls.


It's not that Clinton is womanly but rather it's that she isn't.  Our pussy whipped expectations are so low even women aren't expected to be women.  There isn't the faintest vestige of anything we consider womanly in her.  Men, even as Presidents, are still doing an implicit bone play even if it's only telepathic X-rays with their eyes: you know you want me because I'm the fuckin' President ... yeah, yeah, yeah.  Conversely, Clinton's eyes have no more life than a seagull trying to steal your potato chips.

It's not that Clinton is so good or even such a threat but rather we're such worthless, pussy-whipped chumps.  Trump is so unbelievably bad if any real politician / leader were in-play, he would be nothing more than a bloody stain, slowly spreading on the sidewalk.  However, since Trump is so awful, Clinton looks good by comparison so any criticism becomes instead a foul sexist blow.

Yeah, buddy.  Welcome to Femme Hell.


The price to pay for being pussy-whipped is four years of Presidential Femme Hell so you can be watching these vacant drones slowly realizing, hey, it's just like with the black guy and it didn't make any difference.  He was still a shitty President and so is she.  You should have expected more and that's not a problem in the candidates, it's a problem in you.



Muslims turned into pussies as well.  If the little woman sez, "Hey, Abdul, how about going out to explode yourself for Allah," that crazy fuck will do it.

There isn't a lower example of pussy-whipped than that although sometimes Abdul sez, "Hey, fuck yourself.  You do it."

And she does!

We're not thankful of much but we're definitely thankful we're not in the Middle East.



Even Germans turned into pussies.  They've got PEGIDA which is a group of hemorrhoidal racists from East Germany and the long-time Germans (i.e. Westies) are crying up and down about what to do about the Johnny-Come-Lately Germans (i.e. Easties).  In the past, the Germans would have kicked PEGIDA's ass around its ears.  Don't be coming in my house and giving me shit.  There's a price to pay for that, you PEGIDA fucks.

But they don't do it.



And Brits.  Kee-rist.  They have no idea what they're doing.  They have a little island left and it's got some nuclear subs for which they keep asking, "Does anyone wanna play 'Battleships' with us?"

But no-one does.  Mostly they're just arms dealers and that's kind of macho in a cancerous kind of way.  Maybe they're the only ones who aren't completely pussy-whipped and therefore science should direct its research to discover what imparted this immunity.  If it was the haggis we may not take the cure.

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