Ladies and gentlemen, I must bring to your attention, the latest matter to get the Statue Savers hysterical and salivating is Christopher Columbus must die.
Zen Yogi: how can you say such a vicious thing?
It's not vicious, Brer Bear, when there's ample documentation of the fact he was a miserable bastard and it's ludicrous to believe he discovered America after Indians lived here for millennia. Those statues are bullshit bronze, capitulated chromium, or they're just expensive keepsakes for people who don't give a fuck about the history behind them.
Zen Yogi: those statues keep tumbling down, Silas. If anything Charlottesville accelerated the demolishment.
Sure they tear them down when no-one needed them anyway, especially when what they said wasn't true. People have had it with lies from the state.
How about some Rockhouse clairvoyance, Yogi?
Zen Yogi: sure, Silas, I see fortune teller pundits on TV all the time but I notice their predictions hardly ever come true
See, that's what's cool about being a pundit; it doesn't matter if it comes true since the attention span of the audience doesn't last that long. My prediction will come true, Yogi; trust me.
Zen Yogi: you taught me the only ones on the Internet who say, "Trust me," are pedophiles, gangsters and politicians
I'm quite sure I'm none of those, Yogi, and this will come true. Andrew Jackson will disappear faster than a jet-powered Hellboy for the things he did.
Zen Yogi: That bad?
Andrew Jackson was so evil he makes Trump look like a high school cheerleader. He started the Cherokee Trail of Tears which was based on white man greed since there was no combat and the people of Tennessee simply stole their land. Andrew Jackson was the Presidential driver in genocide against American Indians and he doesn't deserve a statue any more than one for a tribute to smallpox.
Zen Yogi: George Bush was a college cheerleader
He was also a coked-out drunkie so what does that tell you, bear buddy?
Zen Yogi: he was dumb as a rock and he will get a statue?
It's inevitable, Yogi.
Zen Yogi: they scream and dance and claim this is historical revisionism
They scream and dance about almost anything and they'll go berserk if the recipe ever changes for Twinkies.
Pulling down the statues won't do anything to history except reject reverence for people who stained it. In effect, it's a cosmic toilet flush.
Zen Yogi: with heavy philosophy like that, I may need my Zen in restraints, Silas
Yah, that wasn't so elegant but the statues were not for elegant people.
Zen Yogi: will it be long before the Sean Hannity Twinkies Hour?
He runs that now, Bear Buddy. He's just too much of a mutt to realize it.
There's some highly cool news from Hurricane Relief since the Rednecks with Paychecks rolled their monster trucks to Houston where they helped pull military vehicles out of trouble and they're probably in Port Arthur by now. Tip o' the Rockhouse hat to these gentlemen.
Zen Yogi: should we tell them what they do is as Socialist as Papa Marx?
Don't assume they're stupid, Yogi. They just like huge trucks for some crazy reason and this is the first time I ever saw one of those monster trucks doing anything useful. The Rockhouse is diggin' it with these fellows.
Zen Yogi: what about the Unite the Right freakshow in Charlottesville?
Those were Rednecks with No Paychecks or Small Ones and, as we saw, they're as thick as a jar of Georgia peanut butter. In fact, they're the mutated genetic sports we expect to see after a nuke war rather than before.
Zen Yogi: they get all frothy about the Confederate War statues
I tell you what, pal, that lot was frothy already.
Zen Yogi: America can be great but only when what it says is true
Hear, hear, Yogi.
Zen Yogi: how can you say such a vicious thing?
It's not vicious, Brer Bear, when there's ample documentation of the fact he was a miserable bastard and it's ludicrous to believe he discovered America after Indians lived here for millennia. Those statues are bullshit bronze, capitulated chromium, or they're just expensive keepsakes for people who don't give a fuck about the history behind them.
Zen Yogi: those statues keep tumbling down, Silas. If anything Charlottesville accelerated the demolishment.
Sure they tear them down when no-one needed them anyway, especially when what they said wasn't true. People have had it with lies from the state.
How about some Rockhouse clairvoyance, Yogi?
Zen Yogi: sure, Silas, I see fortune teller pundits on TV all the time but I notice their predictions hardly ever come true
See, that's what's cool about being a pundit; it doesn't matter if it comes true since the attention span of the audience doesn't last that long. My prediction will come true, Yogi; trust me.
Zen Yogi: you taught me the only ones on the Internet who say, "Trust me," are pedophiles, gangsters and politicians
I'm quite sure I'm none of those, Yogi, and this will come true. Andrew Jackson will disappear faster than a jet-powered Hellboy for the things he did.
Zen Yogi: That bad?
Andrew Jackson was so evil he makes Trump look like a high school cheerleader. He started the Cherokee Trail of Tears which was based on white man greed since there was no combat and the people of Tennessee simply stole their land. Andrew Jackson was the Presidential driver in genocide against American Indians and he doesn't deserve a statue any more than one for a tribute to smallpox.
Zen Yogi: George Bush was a college cheerleader
He was also a coked-out drunkie so what does that tell you, bear buddy?
Zen Yogi: he was dumb as a rock and he will get a statue?
It's inevitable, Yogi.
Zen Yogi: they scream and dance and claim this is historical revisionism
They scream and dance about almost anything and they'll go berserk if the recipe ever changes for Twinkies.
Pulling down the statues won't do anything to history except reject reverence for people who stained it. In effect, it's a cosmic toilet flush.
Zen Yogi: with heavy philosophy like that, I may need my Zen in restraints, Silas
Yah, that wasn't so elegant but the statues were not for elegant people.
Zen Yogi: will it be long before the Sean Hannity Twinkies Hour?
He runs that now, Bear Buddy. He's just too much of a mutt to realize it.
There's some highly cool news from Hurricane Relief since the Rednecks with Paychecks rolled their monster trucks to Houston where they helped pull military vehicles out of trouble and they're probably in Port Arthur by now. Tip o' the Rockhouse hat to these gentlemen.
Zen Yogi: should we tell them what they do is as Socialist as Papa Marx?
Don't assume they're stupid, Yogi. They just like huge trucks for some crazy reason and this is the first time I ever saw one of those monster trucks doing anything useful. The Rockhouse is diggin' it with these fellows.
Zen Yogi: what about the Unite the Right freakshow in Charlottesville?
Those were Rednecks with No Paychecks or Small Ones and, as we saw, they're as thick as a jar of Georgia peanut butter. In fact, they're the mutated genetic sports we expect to see after a nuke war rather than before.
Zen Yogi: they get all frothy about the Confederate War statues
I tell you what, pal, that lot was frothy already.
Zen Yogi: America can be great but only when what it says is true
Hear, hear, Yogi.
No comments:
Post a Comment