Zen Yogi Meets "The Omen"

If you haven't seen "The Omen," you're about to get a big surprise.


Zen Yogi:  why do they make movies like that?

Oh, right, they're trying to whine "Wonder Woman" into an Oscar and you want to bitch about "The Omen?"

Zen Yogi:  I believe I have good reason when it wants to drop a chandelier on my head

Fair enough, my furry bear buddy.


Zen Yogi:  "Wonder Woman" was just "Terms of Endearment" with swords

Everything has sword fights today, Yogi.  Look forward to "The Bachelorette" with swords and you know that has got to be funny.

Zen Yogi:  how about "The View" with swords?

That's it, Yogi.  If we will watch TV again, it has to be funny.


Zen Yogi:  I thought "The Omen" scared the hell out of you??

It does.  I believe their bullshit and I quiver like a jellyfish in front of Jack Black's School of Fish.

Zen Yogi:  I thought you didn't believe Christianity, Silas

I believe it for horror movies and then I'm fucked.  Next thing I know a chandelier lands on my head.

ML got me with "The Poltergeist" since I had never watched many horror movies but she had seen that one before.  She set me up and that creepy kid blew me out of my chair.

Zen Yogi:  so you never watch horror movies now?

Noooo, I haven't watched one in decades.

Zen Yogi:  yet you watch politics

I do see your point, Yogi, and they do the same thing.

Zen Yogi:  like dropping chandeliers on you?

Yep, that's the thing, furry bear buddy.


Zen Yogi:  what else do you have on chandeliers, Silas?

I'm coming up dry, Yogi.  I'm just not a chandelier kind of guy.

Zen Yogi:  please don't make a poem out of that

I shouldn't have even made a sentence out of it, Brer Bear.

If there are chandeliers then it's probably a ritzy pad and it has servants.  So I'm there in my glorious birthday suit in my booooo-doir while I watch porno movies on my huge-screen TV and then in walks Alfred the Butler?

Zen Yogi:  these days they would just make a twosome

In my days, I'm making it a fucking onesome, mate, because ...

because ...

I'm just not a chandelier kind of guy.

Zen Yogi:  it's probably time to stop, Silas

Telling me to stop is the story of my life ... because ...

I'm just not a chandelier kind of guy.