This is not an article about Negros, niggers, or anything similar as those are part of an entirely different N-fear in America. There is another N-fear that may run even deeper and that comes from (gasp) Nipples. There, I said it and I'm glad.
I don't have a Pinterest account because, well, I'm not interested and it's a prime example of how American ingenuity has disappeared into the Twilight Zone. Where Facebook is a clone of the old America Online, Pinterest is a clone of Facebook which makes it a third-generation derivative of something that was of relatively little consequence in the first place unless you consider America Online's invention of cybersex to be a cultural achievement.
(Ed: If it is of no consequence then why comment?)
Nipples, my brother, Nipples!
My friend, Mimi Juneau, was recently charged with a violation of the Pinterest Terms of Service after she posted a picture which gave a partial glimpse of one of her nipples. I have not seen the picture but I believe it was a pixel nipple rather than a real-world nipple and ...
(Ed: You're joking right?)
I never joke about nipples, bro!
Now there is a primary Nipple Interest in my life and I'm assuming you can guess they don't belong to Mimi but that is not the point. This article is on the matter of Nipple Freedom! Even though my Nipple Interest lies elsewhere, I can still defend and celebrate the cause!
Presumably someone was so emotionally devastated by the mere glimpse of Mimi's partially-exposed pixel nipple that this person felt motivated to lodge a formal complaint which resulted in a take-down order from Pinterest. Now we can likely assume the complainant is either a woman who finds her love life in a McDonald's drive-thru or a man who hates kittens and will likely never actually see a nipple unless he has cash in his hand. There is a third possibility that the complainant was someone from Westboro Baptist Church as they hate everything but, frankly, we doubt there is anyone in that church with sufficient intelligence to master a calculator much less a computer.
I was talking with my friend, Paris Obscur, a wonderful Frenchman who sings original songs on every dimension of love and the subject of America's nipple fear arose. He was incredulous and asked how could a thing of such beauty elicit such fear. I told him this was only part of it as there is a general fear of body parts in America that makes the fear of exploding aircraft trivial by comparison.
Paris asked how can this be when America so delights in showing models with large breasts and revealing large expanses of their skin. I told him this wasn't openness but rather the opposite as you will always see everything ... EXCEPT ... these little parts. Oh, no, no, no, you can't look there. And Heaven help you if you demonstrate such a satanic urge as to breast-feed a baby in public. For such a malevolent act they will send out the hellhounds, the National Guard and, quite possibly, the Daughters of the American Republic.
At this point Paris had to break off as the absurdity of it was too much and he had work to do. People don't realise how much of music is working on mixing, arranging, mastering, etc and that it is much, much more than simply practicing.
If you're looking for an explanation of America's nipple fear then you will have to go to CNN as they're making a business out of explaining things they don't really understand. For our part, we will celebrate the cause of Nipple Freedom and bow reverentially toward a quivering America in the hope that someday it comes to understand it.
I don't have a Pinterest account because, well, I'm not interested and it's a prime example of how American ingenuity has disappeared into the Twilight Zone. Where Facebook is a clone of the old America Online, Pinterest is a clone of Facebook which makes it a third-generation derivative of something that was of relatively little consequence in the first place unless you consider America Online's invention of cybersex to be a cultural achievement.
(Ed: If it is of no consequence then why comment?)
Nipples, my brother, Nipples!
My friend, Mimi Juneau, was recently charged with a violation of the Pinterest Terms of Service after she posted a picture which gave a partial glimpse of one of her nipples. I have not seen the picture but I believe it was a pixel nipple rather than a real-world nipple and ...
(Ed: You're joking right?)
I never joke about nipples, bro!
Now there is a primary Nipple Interest in my life and I'm assuming you can guess they don't belong to Mimi but that is not the point. This article is on the matter of Nipple Freedom! Even though my Nipple Interest lies elsewhere, I can still defend and celebrate the cause!
Presumably someone was so emotionally devastated by the mere glimpse of Mimi's partially-exposed pixel nipple that this person felt motivated to lodge a formal complaint which resulted in a take-down order from Pinterest. Now we can likely assume the complainant is either a woman who finds her love life in a McDonald's drive-thru or a man who hates kittens and will likely never actually see a nipple unless he has cash in his hand. There is a third possibility that the complainant was someone from Westboro Baptist Church as they hate everything but, frankly, we doubt there is anyone in that church with sufficient intelligence to master a calculator much less a computer.
I was talking with my friend, Paris Obscur, a wonderful Frenchman who sings original songs on every dimension of love and the subject of America's nipple fear arose. He was incredulous and asked how could a thing of such beauty elicit such fear. I told him this was only part of it as there is a general fear of body parts in America that makes the fear of exploding aircraft trivial by comparison.
Paris asked how can this be when America so delights in showing models with large breasts and revealing large expanses of their skin. I told him this wasn't openness but rather the opposite as you will always see everything ... EXCEPT ... these little parts. Oh, no, no, no, you can't look there. And Heaven help you if you demonstrate such a satanic urge as to breast-feed a baby in public. For such a malevolent act they will send out the hellhounds, the National Guard and, quite possibly, the Daughters of the American Republic.
At this point Paris had to break off as the absurdity of it was too much and he had work to do. People don't realise how much of music is working on mixing, arranging, mastering, etc and that it is much, much more than simply practicing.
If you're looking for an explanation of America's nipple fear then you will have to go to CNN as they're making a business out of explaining things they don't really understand. For our part, we will celebrate the cause of Nipple Freedom and bow reverentially toward a quivering America in the hope that someday it comes to understand it.
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