The Department of Homeland Security reports credible evidence that the kittens are not yet exploring because of a Muslim conspiracy to prevent them from exercising their rights as free kittens to walk around as they choose.
A Muslim operative was photographed nearby adding further to evidence of the conspiracy.
Some investigators said it just looks like a dog but this is what al Qaeda wants them to think. In fact its purpose is to instill terror in the kittens and prevent them from moving freely. There is additional credible evidence the dog learned the art of camouflage in an al Qaeda training camp.
Here is an an example of what the terrorist dog has caused:
The grey kitten started getting bold enough to try to walk around a little bit but he was immediately returned to the box with the others by his mother, Ms Black. She understands the Muslim conspiracy all too well and knows the only safe place for her kittens is inside the box.
Harvey Shytefurbrainz, lead investigator for the DHS, was asked if perhaps his priorities were a little off relative to the security breach at the Oak Ridge nuclear facility but he replied, "Screw you, I just want to kill some ragheads if it's perfectly alright with you."
Of course, Dickweed Cheney, King of the Fascists and now a sports commentator for Fox News, was asked for his thoughts and he repeated his previous warning: "We're in deep do-do."
When Cheney was asked if he had an education beyond elementary school he replied of course he did as he would have been drafted if he hadn't pretended to go to college. When asked to further illustrate the basis for his contention of 'deep do-do,' he replied, "You sound like a fucking terrorist. Make no mistake you pinko bastard, we are at war."
Cheney was then reminded that the United States hasn't been in a declared war in well over seventy years, he got angry and said, "All I need is a laser target and I will turn you into vapor faster than you can say Alahu Akbar."
The reporter then informed Cheney that he lives in Greece and Cheney responded, "I don't give a fuck where you live. I work for the CIA and I can kill you anywhere I like any time I feel like it. Just give me a reason, bitch!"
Keep the fear alive, Baby! Keep the fear alive!
A Muslim operative was photographed nearby adding further to evidence of the conspiracy.
Some investigators said it just looks like a dog but this is what al Qaeda wants them to think. In fact its purpose is to instill terror in the kittens and prevent them from moving freely. There is additional credible evidence the dog learned the art of camouflage in an al Qaeda training camp.
Here is an an example of what the terrorist dog has caused:
The grey kitten started getting bold enough to try to walk around a little bit but he was immediately returned to the box with the others by his mother, Ms Black. She understands the Muslim conspiracy all too well and knows the only safe place for her kittens is inside the box.
Harvey Shytefurbrainz, lead investigator for the DHS, was asked if perhaps his priorities were a little off relative to the security breach at the Oak Ridge nuclear facility but he replied, "Screw you, I just want to kill some ragheads if it's perfectly alright with you."
Of course, Dickweed Cheney, King of the Fascists and now a sports commentator for Fox News, was asked for his thoughts and he repeated his previous warning: "We're in deep do-do."
When Cheney was asked if he had an education beyond elementary school he replied of course he did as he would have been drafted if he hadn't pretended to go to college. When asked to further illustrate the basis for his contention of 'deep do-do,' he replied, "You sound like a fucking terrorist. Make no mistake you pinko bastard, we are at war."
Cheney was then reminded that the United States hasn't been in a declared war in well over seventy years, he got angry and said, "All I need is a laser target and I will turn you into vapor faster than you can say Alahu Akbar."
The reporter then informed Cheney that he lives in Greece and Cheney responded, "I don't give a fuck where you live. I work for the CIA and I can kill you anywhere I like any time I feel like it. Just give me a reason, bitch!"
Keep the fear alive, Baby! Keep the fear alive!
2 comments:
I want one of the kittens!
Aren't they adorable!
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