The obvious health purpose is harboring rats is in no way healthy unless you're trying to populate a flea circus and don't mind if the fleas carry bubonic plague. Wiping them out gives a clear purpose but it's not the only one.
Various rat bits are needed for Yevette's witchy recipes, the really good ones. She said, "Why, hell, those rat traps are so damn good sometimes it whacks them so hard it pops the eyeballs clean off 'em. I only need to plop them into the cauldron along with a few snips of rat tail and I'm half way to making the immortality spell."
I said, "But no-one will take it with that in it!"
She said, "I will and I promise to come to your boring funeral (wink, wink)."
It gets better because there are parts even more prized since there's nothing more in demand in China than aphrodisiacs and the best way to make some of that is with yer rat gonads. Rats have conveniently large gonads so she can make up a stew of Randy Rat Balls aphrodisiac with only a few rats.
Randy Rat Balls, admittedly, sounds better in Chinese: 兰迪鼠球
(Ed: what does that sound like?)
How should I know when I don't speak Chinese but it's got to be better than Randy Rat Balls.
She has a great sales pitch since she asks, "Why do you think you get an aphrodisiac from a rhinoceros horn when they are rapidly going extinct. What you need is 兰迪鼠球 because rats are fucking everywhere."
She sells this stuff hand over fist.
To everything (even fucking rats)
There is a season (for killing them)
And a time to every purpose, under heaven
Various rat bits are needed for Yevette's witchy recipes, the really good ones. She said, "Why, hell, those rat traps are so damn good sometimes it whacks them so hard it pops the eyeballs clean off 'em. I only need to plop them into the cauldron along with a few snips of rat tail and I'm half way to making the immortality spell."
I said, "But no-one will take it with that in it!"
She said, "I will and I promise to come to your boring funeral (wink, wink)."
It gets better because there are parts even more prized since there's nothing more in demand in China than aphrodisiacs and the best way to make some of that is with yer rat gonads. Rats have conveniently large gonads so she can make up a stew of Randy Rat Balls aphrodisiac with only a few rats.
Randy Rat Balls, admittedly, sounds better in Chinese: 兰迪鼠球
(Ed: what does that sound like?)
How should I know when I don't speak Chinese but it's got to be better than Randy Rat Balls.
She has a great sales pitch since she asks, "Why do you think you get an aphrodisiac from a rhinoceros horn when they are rapidly going extinct. What you need is 兰迪鼠球 because rats are fucking everywhere."
She sells this stuff hand over fist.
To everything (even fucking rats)
There is a season (for killing them)
And a time to every purpose, under heaven
And it's ordained by Heaven. Behold, rats. It is your destiny.
Note to the three-foot rats of South America or Africa: all in fun, mates. Didn't mean nothin' by it. One love, right?
Rat-killin' has been sparse of late so the Chinese will have to endure a period of abstinence which they will likely tolerate about as well as American teenagers. Tip: don't piss them off.
Rat-killin' has been sparse of late so the Chinese will have to endure a period of abstinence which they will likely tolerate about as well as American teenagers. Tip: don't piss them off.
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