Despite the apparent chaos of an election with no connection of any kind to reality or sincere discussion, there is a way to make sense of the madness. Follow the Election 2016 flowchart and come to a decision after only a few brief questions.
See how easy it was. Now why did it take all this time.
(Ed: do you really want me to answer that?)
Nope. We already know and it's so dumb we just don't care.
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