My Wayward Brothers

Lotho sacrificed his only son to, well, sharks, man.  He didn't do it to get to Heaven because he probably has a ticket anyway.  I know his son and he's a good kid so I really don't understand the sacrifice but Lotho sent me a pic and there was the Raven with at least four, maybe five, sharks swimming around him.




(Ed:  that's not a shark.  It's a fookin' dolphin!)

Yah, well, it's a big ass fish!

(Ed:  it's not a fish either.  It's a fookin' mammal.  Is there anything you do know about this picture.)

Well, I'm sure that's The Raven.






See.  Sharks.  That's what I'm talkin' about.

(Ed:  they're just little ones!)

Yah, right.  Tell that to his body as they chew the limbs off it.

(Ed:  they're tame sharks)

Let's review the Silas Theory of Avoiding Being a Food Product:  if anything has more teeth then I, we call such a creature a predator.  What do we do with predators?

All together now, class.  We stay the fuck away from them!

(Ed:  I thought you want to use The Raven in your next video??)

I do ... if there's anything left of him.  This picture was only taken yesterday or the day before.  The Raven may be (i.e. probably is) doing an internal review of the shark digestion process right now.



Now I'm not suggesting Doc should sacrifice any his progeny to sharks but he is angry all the time.  He's such an angry guy he might get angry for saying he's angry guy but he knows it's true although I don't think anyone knows why.  Seems he's been pissed off ever since we were kids.  That's probably because I was always faster than he on a racetrack.

(Ed:  that's bullshit!)

Yah, I know but he will still get pissed off (larfs).

Doc, take it easy or a Valium or something.  The purpose isn't to piss you off but rather to make the point not being pissed off is better.

Note:  I do not mean that about Valium.  Those kinds of drugs are dangerous in appearing benign when they are not.


Doc likely regards my political positions as polemical but really they're just common sense.  If you pay a lot for the military and don't get anything then just maybe reducing your outlay makes good budgetary sense.

The positions generally play out with Doc going full Dark Side with being a Sith Lord for the GOP.  Unknown if he is so far gone he thinks Carly Fiorina is attractive or Ted Cruz is the New Messiah but he's way over to that side and any reduction in the military gets a predictable reaction.  You know how it goes with war hawks.   If you question it, they get like you saw a picture of their sexting pics from their cellphones and only said, "Well, it looks a little small, doesn't it."

Zoom!  Lasers, bombs, and nuclear weapons start exploding.  I'll show you too fucking small, motherfucker.


Lotho is taking up with the Goldwater Republicans so his reaction on cutting the military is, well, hold up a minute there, Salvage City, let's take another look at what you want to cut.


Here on the Socialist Left, we say no aircraft has been launched against the U.S. Navy in anger in at least fifty years so get rid of the fucking things.



The only interesting part to this article so far is whether The Raven got eaten by a shark so inquiring minds need to know.  What we already know is mixing the Socialist Left with the Sith Lords on the Extreme Right is not a good idea.

What we observe of Sith Lords is they can find a million reasons not to do something.  It doesn't even need justification since you know they don't.  They can't afford it, they think it's amoral, or they just don't fookin' like modern art.  They even want to cut off hippie artists from public endowments.

(Ed:  they want everyone wearing grey uniforms and carrying Chairman Mao's handbook!)

Nah, that's what they think the Socialist Left wants to do but (sob) we haven't even read it.  Frankly, I don't know what the fuck they want but it really doesn't seem like much of anything more than guys, guys, guys ... just don't change anything, ok.


Doc loves dogs.  I'm definitely sure of that.  He may have more than three of them and one went walkabout recently.  Doc freaked and it's not like he gets Paris Hilton about some little fucking Yorkie but rather these are laid-back hanging around the house being cool kind of dogs.

I bet he cried when the dog was lost and it may piss him off to say that but I cry watching chick movies.

(Ed:  yah but Doc isn't gay)

Well, I'm not gay either.  I've watched "Full Metal Jacket."

(Ed:  that almost certainly means you are gay.  Did you cry when Cowboy died?)

Tip:  it's a fuckin' movie.


So, we go for some human interest, see.  Nobody wants to get pissed off because, well, everyone is pissed off already.  Doc loves dogs and Lotho seems to see them kind of like old warriors who pass through his life while I see Tobey the Dog as the rescue case and I get a bang out of him being happy about that.

(Ed:  is there anything which even slightly approximates a question in this?)

Yah, so let's hear about Doc's guitars, what you did with them, what you like to play, what you thought about it, you know, interesting stuff.  I've never understood why that was a secret and I'm curious.


In fact, when there were three guitars, it's likely there is electronics knowledge and musical computerosity which means it may be possible to record tracks.  Even with raw audio, there is reasonably good success with getting a good sync on files shipped to musicians across the Internet.  I recorded with Kim Seifert years back and I never even met her until some years after.

(Ed:  too old for that)

Fuck that!  I'm the same age I always was, it's only my body which gets older.

(Ed:  that's so hackneyed)

Yah but tell me it ain't true.


Doc, what is your Zen, man.  We need to find your central thang, your nexus, your oblivious profundicus, and from this wellspring comes forth jams of great magnificence.

(Ed:  what is oblivious profundicus?)

No idea.  Just liked the sound.


The idea of collaborating with The Raven or what's left of him and a Suitable Squeeze is highly intriguing and it would be the same if Doc's guitar could roll into that in some way.

(Ed:  you patronize)

This is music, motherfucker.  Keep that in mind lest you blaspheme again.

(Ed:  maybe he's better than you)

If he is then he knows it doesn't matter and he knows that's not a reason to skip a jam (larfs).


Fair dinkum, it's an honest curiosity.  For me, there's a compulsion to make a fool out of myself but I'm the Crazy Eddie and the rest of the family doesn't do it or at least not much.

(Ed:  will you ever stop putting references to Larry Niven sci-fi into articles?)

Probably not.  "The Mote in God's Eye" should be required reading in school for the extraordinary way sociological matters are addressed.


I know Doc took some hand whackage a while back and I can't even imagine the bitch in that but it seems playing would still be possible.  He is left-handed so a hit to that hand isn't quite as catastrophic as the right because that one does all the fingering.

Fark ... unless he prefers finger-picking.  That would be a stab in the heart then.


I would bring the Mystery Lady into this to sing it as well if I could.  Collaboration seems a great vibe for "Andromeda Weeps" because this is a we-are-the-world love song.  There's the grand love between Jason and Andromeda and the kozmik love in she asks Jason to give up his life with her so people may live on somewhere.

(Ed:  it's a bit hammerhead on the religious metaphor)

See, collaboration, man.  We talk, we make stuff.  We don't see the story as hammerhead, tho.  The parallel is inevitable with the question she asks and we believe she really would ask it.  Don't go, Jason.  If we must die then let it be together.

Note:  in case you're not a regular.  It's a false alarm and no-one dies.

The song says humanity will die from the radiation for the sins of those who make the weapons.

Note:  I'm seriously open to discussion of the matter because it's a massive concept insofar as people say we must continue making weapons because America needs the jobs.  We do NOT want to identify the sinners in the song, only that Jason and Andromeda are not among them.

The above will continue in another article.  The theme of altruistic suicide and a religious metaphor need some review.