Unfortunately, selling my body for education at University was not an option because I, along with most male friends, had enough difficulty giving it away.
There has always been some number of girls hookin' to pay tuition and I see zero dishonor in that but rather I see one determined female. It would be peachy if they worked for free sometimes but (sob) I don't think that's how it works.
The object is to find some laughs as the story is real. There's a Web site in England for 'making arrangements' and this is the college girl / sugar daddy hotline, baybeeeee. (Fox: Sugar babies: Students sell sex to pay rising tuition)
Wowee Zowee, Suzy Creamcheese!
Oh, you think it's just a flash in the pan ... well ... almost 13,000 girls have signed up for it. How does that flash your pan, Testosterone Boy??
The guy who runs the place said many of the people who use the site wind up marrying each other and then there was an example of some guy who has four sugar babies so I imagine they will be converting to Mormon cultists to find marital fulfillment.
Now I imagine the first question, see, is what does yer average sugar baby cost and that comes to about twenty-five hundred quid or about four thousand samolians per year ... we assume that's before costs such as condoms. So yer Big Stud back there is yer Ten-Thousand Pound Sugar Daddy.
Hey there, Texas Oil Tycoon, that's about $16,000 for yer university girl budget, assuming you also want four of them ... but ... since you're Texas, you will be wanting to bring about $40,000. Easy money ... blow up a few of yer oil wells and claim them on insurance. Make the suckers pay for it.
We think this is all quite funny ... except for the Ten-Thousand Pound Sugar Daddy as creepy like that needs a warning label.
BEWARE I AM AN OLD CREEPY GUY WHO PAYS MONEY FOR YOUNG GIRLS
Yep, they should have warning labels
No, no, no, that ain't me, babe. I may be a creepy old guy but I don't pay money for young girls. Nah, I don't do that. They throw their lingerie on the stage and they all come back for the after party.
It wasn't uncommon for multiple women to be dancing naked around me and making various oh-so-lewd suggestions to see if they could break me up in a gig. I'd tell them, give it your best shot. They did.
As to what happened after that ... well ... I'll tell you what happened ... I fookin' died. Any man who seriously tries to tangle with that many women at the same time is on an express ride to a myocardial infarct and that's, technically speaking, a vapor lock.
So now we're seein' it. Mr Palm Beach Entrepeneur gets to thinkin', well, if they can get away with it in England without gettin' busted for hookin' then why not in the good old U.S. of A. Lots of pretty university students in deep debt and what's that say ... hookers.
The Brit scam isn't hooking or escorting but rather an arrangement ... from which the university student gets money, quite a bit of money. The Sugar Daddy must have put down his Sugar Daddy Deposit with the madam, erm, Web site manager for earnest money and, guessing from his wish to buy a relationship, we're thinking he is highly earnest. Up-front, university girl knows he has paid big bucks just to hang out to talk about what classes she takes ... and sunsets are so beautiful, aren't they.
Somehow Brits are passing this off so cops don't bust anyone for hookin' and I know at least one of the ranches in Nevada is doing it already but there they call it straight-up hookin'. In England, they are talking about long-term 'arrangements.'
So, here's the Million-Dollar Idea: there are many cathouses in the country, some legal but mostly not. All of them have the same problem as they need some angle to set them apart.
Here's what we're thinkin', see, is you get one of those wind-blowin' gadgets which blows you up in the air and you can fly around in kind of an adult bouncy house.
Yah, we know where your dirty mind went with that and, sure as hell, preacher or no, we're goin' there to. Yeah, buddy ... Weightless, Free-Fall, College-Girl Hooker Sex.
Those Brits think they can steal a march of the good old U.S. of A but no sirree, that's not how we play this game ...
because ...
because ...
America has more Sugar Daddies than Hershey has Snickers candy bars and we can offer something they cannot find anywhere else ... and it comes with naked university girls.
Weightless ...
Freefall ...
Naked ...
College Girls ...
and You, Sugar Daddy!
Well ... is that a million bucks or what?
(Ed: if Lamar Odom likes it then we will say it is a good idea)
Well, it looks like he's hookin' up again so ... give him about a month. We will get back to you with a report on that.
There has always been some number of girls hookin' to pay tuition and I see zero dishonor in that but rather I see one determined female. It would be peachy if they worked for free sometimes but (sob) I don't think that's how it works.
The object is to find some laughs as the story is real. There's a Web site in England for 'making arrangements' and this is the college girl / sugar daddy hotline, baybeeeee. (Fox: Sugar babies: Students sell sex to pay rising tuition)
Wowee Zowee, Suzy Creamcheese!
Oh, you think it's just a flash in the pan ... well ... almost 13,000 girls have signed up for it. How does that flash your pan, Testosterone Boy??
The guy who runs the place said many of the people who use the site wind up marrying each other and then there was an example of some guy who has four sugar babies so I imagine they will be converting to Mormon cultists to find marital fulfillment.
Now I imagine the first question, see, is what does yer average sugar baby cost and that comes to about twenty-five hundred quid or about four thousand samolians per year ... we assume that's before costs such as condoms. So yer Big Stud back there is yer Ten-Thousand Pound Sugar Daddy.
Hey there, Texas Oil Tycoon, that's about $16,000 for yer university girl budget, assuming you also want four of them ... but ... since you're Texas, you will be wanting to bring about $40,000. Easy money ... blow up a few of yer oil wells and claim them on insurance. Make the suckers pay for it.
We think this is all quite funny ... except for the Ten-Thousand Pound Sugar Daddy as creepy like that needs a warning label.
BEWARE I AM AN OLD CREEPY GUY WHO PAYS MONEY FOR YOUNG GIRLS
Yep, they should have warning labels
No, no, no, that ain't me, babe. I may be a creepy old guy but I don't pay money for young girls. Nah, I don't do that. They throw their lingerie on the stage and they all come back for the after party.
It wasn't uncommon for multiple women to be dancing naked around me and making various oh-so-lewd suggestions to see if they could break me up in a gig. I'd tell them, give it your best shot. They did.
As to what happened after that ... well ... I'll tell you what happened ... I fookin' died. Any man who seriously tries to tangle with that many women at the same time is on an express ride to a myocardial infarct and that's, technically speaking, a vapor lock.
So now we're seein' it. Mr Palm Beach Entrepeneur gets to thinkin', well, if they can get away with it in England without gettin' busted for hookin' then why not in the good old U.S. of A. Lots of pretty university students in deep debt and what's that say ... hookers.
The Brit scam isn't hooking or escorting but rather an arrangement ... from which the university student gets money, quite a bit of money. The Sugar Daddy must have put down his Sugar Daddy Deposit with the madam, erm, Web site manager for earnest money and, guessing from his wish to buy a relationship, we're thinking he is highly earnest. Up-front, university girl knows he has paid big bucks just to hang out to talk about what classes she takes ... and sunsets are so beautiful, aren't they.
Somehow Brits are passing this off so cops don't bust anyone for hookin' and I know at least one of the ranches in Nevada is doing it already but there they call it straight-up hookin'. In England, they are talking about long-term 'arrangements.'
So, here's the Million-Dollar Idea: there are many cathouses in the country, some legal but mostly not. All of them have the same problem as they need some angle to set them apart.
Here's what we're thinkin', see, is you get one of those wind-blowin' gadgets which blows you up in the air and you can fly around in kind of an adult bouncy house.
Yah, we know where your dirty mind went with that and, sure as hell, preacher or no, we're goin' there to. Yeah, buddy ... Weightless, Free-Fall, College-Girl Hooker Sex.
Those Brits think they can steal a march of the good old U.S. of A but no sirree, that's not how we play this game ...
because ...
because ...
America has more Sugar Daddies than Hershey has Snickers candy bars and we can offer something they cannot find anywhere else ... and it comes with naked university girls.
Weightless ...
Freefall ...
Naked ...
College Girls ...
and You, Sugar Daddy!
Well ... is that a million bucks or what?
(Ed: if Lamar Odom likes it then we will say it is a good idea)
Well, it looks like he's hookin' up again so ... give him about a month. We will get back to you with a report on that.
4 comments:
The US has had "arrangement" websires for ever.
The entrepeneurs don't let me down (larfs).
I am sure if Raven were to google Cougars.com
He could find a mature woman that will pay rent and appreciate his good looks and beard
Is it ok if I raffle him to them?? He could fetch some big bucks that way! This ain't uni, tho, as it's more like doing business.
I am concerned about those uni girls, tho. These sugar daddies have big bucks and maybe when that 'arrangement' blows, she decides, wtf, might as well go full pro. She needs the wit of Xaviera Hollander to be a real courtesan and anything less will leave her standing on a street corner.
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