If there was any question about who would win that contest, you haven't been reading this blog for very long. Jeb Bush should understand, tho. What other family knows better that it doesn't matter how fast you can move but rather how many legs you've got to go around bribing the judges.
Here's a link to learn more about the Cambrian period or maybe it's how to bribe judges. I get confused like that sometimes. (LiveScience: Cambrian Period: Facts & Information)
Pictured: Armadillidium vulgare or pillbug. As to which is the front or the back, unless you're another pillbug, who cares.
The problem with pillbugs other than being pillbugs is they love to swim.
There's one problem with that: they can't.
If you have ever spent any time working on an in-ground swimming pool then, more than likely, you already know more about pillbugs than anyone ever wants to know. I don't mean they just love to swim as pillbugs are like a crustacean kamikaze swim team, they think if they only sacrifice enough warriors then eventually they will make it to the Olympics.
Who knows how close to pre-Cambrian times the pillbug began its evolution but it's a very ancient creature. Somewhere in all those billions of years, one might have thought some pillbug would have stood up, as best a pillbug can, to address his pillbug peers to tell them their dream of being the Crustacean Olympic Swim Team will probably not happen but still they swim ... like pre-weighted lemmings.
Something novel about these creatures is they will curl up into a ball when threatened. There was something else I noticed in my reading about pillbugs: recipes. You are invited to pursue this aspect on your own time as I did not (burp).
Part of the interest in the pre-Cambrian period is this is the time that gave us trilobites and you've really got to love crustaceans to find intrigue in them but my friend, Ronald Duritsch, founded Trilobyte Software and released, among other things, a product called MasterFinder which became an absolutely-required piece of software on every Mac I ran for years. If you have mainframe experience then you can probably relate to this software through SPF / ISPF, it was that useful.
You would have to ask Ronald why the software eventually faded from favor but it was a brilliant piece of work and meticulously-engineered. There is no purpose in pimping my friend's software as it's not available anymore but it was an excellent piece of work and, in fact, is still missed. Apple has absorbed some aspects of it with the multi-column view in Finder but it's not even close to what MasterFinder could do.
Bringing this back to Jeb Bush, Armadillidium's swimming capabilities are roughly equivalent to the portion of world savvy in the Bush consciousness that does not involve narcissism. Where his brother was the (cough) war President, he would wind up as the Bore President. Even with a Hispanic wife who can probably salsa until the sun comes up, he's still boring. Yah and tell me even the GOP cares what this tiresome load of middle-aged whale blubber watches on television. Even his wife doesn't care as she's dying for him to go back to work for (cough) reasons of her own. This guy brings the same kind of radical to thinking that Crisco brings to cooking.
Here's a link to learn more about the Cambrian period or maybe it's how to bribe judges. I get confused like that sometimes. (LiveScience: Cambrian Period: Facts & Information)
Pictured: Armadillidium vulgare or pillbug. As to which is the front or the back, unless you're another pillbug, who cares.
The problem with pillbugs other than being pillbugs is they love to swim.
There's one problem with that: they can't.
If you have ever spent any time working on an in-ground swimming pool then, more than likely, you already know more about pillbugs than anyone ever wants to know. I don't mean they just love to swim as pillbugs are like a crustacean kamikaze swim team, they think if they only sacrifice enough warriors then eventually they will make it to the Olympics.
Who knows how close to pre-Cambrian times the pillbug began its evolution but it's a very ancient creature. Somewhere in all those billions of years, one might have thought some pillbug would have stood up, as best a pillbug can, to address his pillbug peers to tell them their dream of being the Crustacean Olympic Swim Team will probably not happen but still they swim ... like pre-weighted lemmings.
Something novel about these creatures is they will curl up into a ball when threatened. There was something else I noticed in my reading about pillbugs: recipes. You are invited to pursue this aspect on your own time as I did not (burp).
Part of the interest in the pre-Cambrian period is this is the time that gave us trilobites and you've really got to love crustaceans to find intrigue in them but my friend, Ronald Duritsch, founded Trilobyte Software and released, among other things, a product called MasterFinder which became an absolutely-required piece of software on every Mac I ran for years. If you have mainframe experience then you can probably relate to this software through SPF / ISPF, it was that useful.
You would have to ask Ronald why the software eventually faded from favor but it was a brilliant piece of work and meticulously-engineered. There is no purpose in pimping my friend's software as it's not available anymore but it was an excellent piece of work and, in fact, is still missed. Apple has absorbed some aspects of it with the multi-column view in Finder but it's not even close to what MasterFinder could do.
Bringing this back to Jeb Bush, Armadillidium's swimming capabilities are roughly equivalent to the portion of world savvy in the Bush consciousness that does not involve narcissism. Where his brother was the (cough) war President, he would wind up as the Bore President. Even with a Hispanic wife who can probably salsa until the sun comes up, he's still boring. Yah and tell me even the GOP cares what this tiresome load of middle-aged whale blubber watches on television. Even his wife doesn't care as she's dying for him to go back to work for (cough) reasons of her own. This guy brings the same kind of radical to thinking that Crisco brings to cooking.
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