Donald Trump Proposes Selling Iraq to Iran to Recover Losses

Due to the enormous costs to the United States from the conflict in the Middle East, Donald Trump has proposed a sound business solution.  The only thing of significance in Iraq is the oil so sell them out to the Iranians.  They will pay handsomely for the land which is worth nothing to the U.S.  This money will substantially offset the cost of well over a trillion dollars for the Iraq engagement and miscellaneous area conflicts.

When asked what about the oil, Trump replied it doesn't matter who sells the oil, the only thing of any importance is whether it gets pumped out of the ground and delivered.  He likes people who meet their contractual obligations and, more often than not, Iraqis blow theirs into a million pieces.

He was also asked what about the Iraqi people but he just laughed and said, "We're killing them now. How is this any worse than that?"

When asked of his thoughts regarding Iran and a nuclear weapons program, he said any provocation at all from Iran means he will glass the entire country.

He was asked to clarify and said he would ensure Iran will never build nuclear weapons until a new type of creature evolves in the radioactive sand.  When asked about Israel, he said certainly he would not attack our friends in Israel but they should definitely take cover as there will be a really, really, big bang.

Still the question of the oil came back and Trump was asked what good is the oil if the country is radioactive.  He replied horizontal drilling techniques mean the oil could be pulled from a rig in the middle of the Med if he likes.  He added, this is the business mind, always thinking.

Trump closed by saying it is a simple proposal but a sound one for business.  If people get radioactive then you have to understand this is the cost of doing business and it should be accepted gracefully.

The Cat Review of the Reverend's First Show (video)

The Cat Review is now official and it is deemed 'cool for a beginning.'  I told her she was generous with this and her time.  Don't read that as curt as that's not how we do.  She sends her message precisely so any request for clarification as in 'what did you mean' is only a request for stroking.

Unknown why it gives a crumby thumbnail but the video is online now.  That little clock icon on the top right is the clicker for the link to the blog but watch him when you open the video.  For me, he disappeared when watching in a window and only appeared if I shifted to fullscreen.  It's not that you will so desperately need it but rather it's unusual it changes like that.

Family may understand what I mean when I say there was too much Alex in it and not enough Anne. He's the Great Scientist and she is the Mother of the Earth.  There is no self-predation as I observe the way Sasquatch shifts to the Wow-I-Am-SO-Serious look then back to a more relaxed Sasquatch.  Blood will know the source of that move and I did not know I do it.  So, that's a lesson for the next one.  In a way, he still teaches me ... and so does she.


This was a really novel experience for me.  This isn't The Thing but it's on its way toward it and thanks to Miss Mona for bringing life to it.  I am one life and she is another life but two lives on a video are more than one.  Whether that idea is real or only poetry anywhere else is your call but for video the dynamic is excellent and that role will evolve.

As to music, there is the potential for Thursday but I'll hold off just yet.  Potential increases as this Sasquatch thing gives more control over the mixer and it knows I've got its cojones on the table and if it gives me any more hassle then I will hit them with a hammer.  I will, too.  Mine got hit by a hammer (i.e. car) and, yah, it hurts but you survive ... usually..

Will review for Thursday. An exceptionally unusual situation has been preventing it but the cause of that seems to be resolving.  Mystifying stuff.

Reverend Sasquatch Gets First Show into the Bag

The good Reverend with his ghostly assistant, Miss Mona, completed the first show and the grade back here at the Ministry of the Internet is about a C+ in too much determination and not enough funny.

Not surprisingly, only a few people visited but it's not clear when they come / go so I don't really know what happened with that.

Mostly this was jumping into it to find out what happens.  OK, no guitar, no nothin' ... go.  It turned out to be much more nervous-making than I anticipated as it makes sense to me to go on-stage with a guitar as that's what I do with it.  There's no question of focus or intention in that circumstance whereas everything is fluid if you only have a mike in your hand.  I've always admired comedians and singers the most for their courage as they have zero props, no shield, no protection ... only that microphone.

As to whether this one would save any souls, maybe if it were a deep-sea salvage operation and could do it mechanically but that's not saving a soul, that's just getting it dry.


Here at the Ministry of the Internet, I'm calling it a success because no-one got struck by lightning while we did it and it went end-to-end without explosions or fire alarms.  The technique needs work but that's ok.  I hoped I could deliver more but that gives the challenge for the next one.  Miss Mona did well with it as she's got no script and rolls with it wondering what comes next.  From this one I see it needs to have more of an outline for next time.  There still won't be a script but the outline is important.


Where to find an audience for this guy is a novel question as social networks are whirlpools of self-reinforcing narcissism.  They're a troubling social phenomenon as well in the destructiveness toward real relationships is extreme.

If not there then where ... well ... we shall see.


It's only people who go way off the wall who will understand it but there's no genius in making a simple thing complex, it's the other way around.


One bizarre note:  Cat tried to watch from Germany but she was blocked by YouTube which said it wasn't permitted in her country.  Google prevents the Word of the Lord from reaching the Germans.  Bastards.

Odd one, that.  No good explanation for why they should do that and it's not known which other countries are blocked.  Bloody rubbish.


So, pleased at accomplishing it and that drives doing it better.  Will review prior to deciding on when to do another.

Reverend Silas Theology Sasquatch, Undead Celebrity Vampire Preacher at 2pm Texas Time on YouTube

The good Reverend Silas Theology Sasquatch with Miss Mona the Ghost will bring the message of, well, no message at all to the world at 2pm Central / 3pm Eastern / 8pm England / 9pm Germany.  He's going to talk about believing things but he won't tell you what to believe, he only suggests to believe what you know already.  Watch the show on YouTube at 2pm.

As with all fundamentalists, the fundamentalist atheists will hate it for the mention of God.  Any thinking atheist can accept the possibility God exists but he has no reason to believe it.  The good Reverend is not interested in convincing you one way or the other but will reinforce one key aspect of something many believe already.  Regardless of whether your interest is atheism or theology, it's germane in either context.  In effect, it's the separation of God from religion which is what religion does anyway but that's where people get so confused and forget altogether thirteen billion human-type years elapsed between when God did something, assuming he did anything at all, and when Jesus arrived on Earth.

That's the whole ten bucks in a bucket right there.  The good Reverend doesn't preach as preachers do way too much of that already.  We're guessing you already know what's in the Bible and we don't need to read it to you.  The same applies to the Torah, the Koran, or any religious document as we don't have any problem with anything in any of them because they are all the best truth people were capable of telling and, in most of these cases, they are the only truth which remained.  It's your judgment whether they are true but that is not the good Reverend's business.


Whoops ... there's no way to kick up ten bucks.  The good Reverend will need one of those and on this page as this is where the video will send people.  That will appear shortly in the sidebar.

Important note:  it must not be more than ten bucks as I have to own it publicly otherwise.  This has to be clean like Bernie Sanders (i.e. no super PAC money).    Thanks for the ten bucks but don't chuck a dime if you don't feel ten bucks worth of soul saving.  I very much need this to be the Will of the People, whatever it is.


(Ed:  what celebrity?)

I sat in a car with Jack Brabham once ... going really, really fast.

Don't Want to Live Like a Refugee

The subject of refugees is of direct and growing concern to many people around the world, most particularly the refugees who continue to starve and die or they perish by hundreds at a time when a leaky refugee ship sinks in the Med.

Cat and I spoke of it earlier and she wants an answer immediately.  Mothers are sick and babies are dying and I need an answer Right Now.

My answer can't apply right now but it is nevertheless the only one truly effective as we have tried patching this precise problem many, many times and we know from this experience it never works.  You can't give money, cupcakes, or free Coca-Cola because 'feel good' solutions don't accomplish anything except for a very short time, after which people get even angrier because they spent money and the refugees never went anywhere.  Meanwhile, refugees keep going ... but thanks for the Coke.


The subject will be addressed by the good Reverend at 2pm Texas time today.  The introduction is the Ten-Dollar Flat-Rate Soul Saving Paradigm but there's not much content to that.


Emphasizing until you hear it for yourself and know it for sure.  Reverend Silas is a preacher who does not preach.  He will not sell you anything (unless he finds some cool merch you may like) as you most likely already have a religion and the good Reverend has no interest in disturbing that.

The main thing about Preacher Silas is, well, he doesn't preach.  To some extent it's reverse preaching but I can't let myself think I get too subtle with that because, well, it isn't that subtle.


Cat offered some resources in talking with her about NAZIs as, man, you don't know how much Germans hate NAZIs, you really don't.  This will be something for the future but don't look at these things as pitching doom and gloom.  Sasquatch doesn't believe that, Scarborough doesn't believe it, and there's some crazy-ass puppet master who doesn't believe it either.

In telling you about NAZIs, the purpose will be to tell you what people do to fight them ... with music.  There are festivals in Germany which are 'gegen NAZIs' (i.e. against NAZIs).  This is the hope and it's not Shirley Temple hope in that it happens right now.

If this is doom and gloom then, well, People Get Ready:

Reverend Silas T Sasquatch Live Video Test Was Successful

Surely blessed by the grace of at least a few passing doves, Reverend Silas T Sasquatch and Miss Mona the Ghost successfully withstood the depredations of the electronic demons and emerged victorious in the promised virtual broadcast band.

The call-in test was the most wide-open variable but, apart from being hampered by some crumby headphones, the process works as designed in that talking with the caller will be echoed via the MOTI Mike to the viewers as it goes out over the headphones mike to the caller and everything the caller says will go directly to the speakers.


Mike levels checked out well and were balanced for the good Reverend and Miss Mona using different mikes.  The overall volume was good going out on the video stream but was not excellent.  There doesn't seem any way to crank it higher here without distorting it but that game is endless.  The main situation is it achieves an adequate level and in time will drive a better one.  As it stands it's fine to start.


The timing of the debut show is tentative for 2:00 pm Central / Texas Time.

Das ist 2100 in Deutschland.

The time of the gala premiere will be eight o'clock p.m. by the measure of Her Majesty's Royal Cock, Chantismear, in London.  For the opening event, the Right Honorable Reverend Silas Theology Sasquatch will welcome Norman Bates of enduring fame for his stabbing.  When the cock crows eight, Reverend Sasquatch welcomes Mister Bates.


In tomorrow's episode, The Ten-Dollar Flat-Rate Soul Saving Paradigm

Bring Back Orange Sunshine, I Want to Be Noah Again

The original sixties quote was 'bring back Orange Sunshine, I want to be God again' but that doesn't work as we need Noah ... so God can talk to him.

(Ed:  are you stealing Bill Cosby?)

Righty, right, matey.  If you will steal then steal from the best.

In the original bit, God thinks it would be funny to try to talk Noah into putting all the animals of the world onto a boat and Bill Cosby sets to talk him into it.

Bill Cosby cupped his hand over the mike and practically swallowed it to get the deep voice for God ... but ... we have the magic Vocalist LiveFX and I can pull bass with that thing that sounds like I once jammed with Paul Robeson.

Knocking off the bit blows but it might be funny to recall it.  Stirring up legions of outraged feminists wouldn't be too cool but, hey, the guy was funny.  Off-stage it turns out he was quite an asshole but he wouldn't be the first artist to win that title.  Unless he kills someone, he doesn't even approach Jackson Pollock for assholeness.


There's an old as in ancient joke about how do you get to Carnegie Hall but Cat had not heard it.  This is one of the masterpieces of musical comedy so that may well enter the Sasquatch mix as it's a cool application for the bass voice and carries a whole lot of blues but implied rather than wept.

(Ed:  what possible twist on that joke?)

The telling has been rehearsed because how do I know it even works.  That sounded good and it's got a little bit of shaggy dog but not anywhere near enough to lose the precision of the original joke.  When a good many of the people listening may already know the punchline, you've got to give them a reason to wait for it.  The bigger trick will be finding a reason to do it.  Since we're on the subject of God already, how about I tell you how to get to Carnegie Hall (gong).


Oh, and some of you doubted the veracity of the claim of ordination by the good Reverend.  Herewith, the proof (excerpt):

WELCOME to the UNIVERSAL LIFE CHURCH Reverend Silas Theology Sasquatch Click Here To View Your Credentials and receive your confirmation email Click only once. Also, please make sure your printer is connected before clicking.

The Universal Life Church has sent your application for ordination from ULC MONASTERY in Tucson, Arizona to Modesto, California. Providing that you filled out the form properly with your legal first and last name, it will be approved and entered into the International Database of the Ministry of the Church, whose numbers are in excess of 20 million ordained ministers worldwide.

See, the good Reverend is one of a select cadre of twenty million.  There does not appear to be any fee required for registration of my ministry in Fort Worth nor is there a requirement for inspection of papers so, as nearly as I can tell, I can legally marry people right now.   I can legally bury people as well but no fuckin' way is this preacher plantin' a stiff in the ground.  This is not going to happen.

Note:  you will still need a license for marrying humans but we are not so limited here at the Ministry of the Internet.  Marry whatever you like, just treat whatever it is right.  Be forewarned, if you do unnatural things to an animal under the guise of this marriage, your tallywhacker will fall off.  Maybe you don't think such things are unnatural ... but the horse does.  Your tallywhacker will fall off.


The good Reverend has conducted multiple marriages in the past but now there is a new angle:  Internet wedding.  You two start a Skype conference call and then contact the Good Reverend.  Unless you are on heavy drugs, brandishing guns, or look like Republicans, the good Reverend will probably marry you.  Send in the license for his signature and he will send it back by return mail.

Kiss the bride or whatever you have there, young Viking, and please do take one bit of preacherly advice.  That kiss was not the foreplay.


This, in combination with our Dial-A-Sinner program, should make for an innovative roster of spiritually enriching endeavors sure to fill your heart and your soul with, well, utter rubbish ... but that's my job.  I am a TV preacher.

And remember, we never charge anything beyond the initial soul saving premium of ten dollars.  If you want to send another million so we can build a hideous, pseudo-modern church in suburbia which is so cheaply-constructed it's guaranteed to burn everyone in it if there's ever even a fire in an ashtray ... well, that would be alright.

Sheriff Was Not Killed 'Execution-Style' in Texas

It's not bad enough a cop gets shot but it has to be hyped into something it wasn't and the otherwise sad story is marginalized by it.  (CNN:  Suspect arrested, charged in Texas deputy's slaying)

Note:  the headline is reasonable but a number of lurid quotes are presented from the sheriff's department about executions.

The fellow who shot that sheriff was a lunatic.  He did it where he could be easily observed, where CCTV could film him, and he drove a car whose plates were noted.  There is no chance this guy was an assassin as anyone paying for a murder is not going to hire a moron.

This is one more kernel popping as the heat goes up.  Black guys, white guys, they blow their corks and start shooting just the same.  There's no logic as they are past where any agreeable logic matters because they make it up as they go.

Shooting a sheriff in the back with multiple rounds from a heavy-guage handgun apparently wasn't drama enough.  It was an execution.  Right.

Hot tip on that, Johnnie Law.  The cop is dead.  Obviously it was an execution.  So is any murder whether it's done by a Mafia hitman or some lunatic with nothing better to do that evening than effect is Grand Crazy Plan.  All this shooting sucks whether the victims are cops, non-cops, or kids who just happened to wander into the line of fire.

About Contacting Reverend Silas T Sasquatch

The Sasquatch.MOTI account will changed to accept calls from anyone during the course of the show and this will prevent the need for establishing a permanent contact.  It was excellent to confirm this as managing contacts becomes almost impossible with permanent contacts.  For example, should the good Reverend accept a number of contact requests prior to a call-in session and then call back any which have contacted in that time.  What should he do with the ones for whom there was not time.  Give them to God.  That system doesn't work.  So ... open calling.  Definitely a good answer.

(Ed:  why treat this thing like it's worth a million bucks when it's never broadcast a single show?)

Because if I don't it never can be.  Even though likely it never will be anyway, never go into anything thinking it will fail.  If you don't believe, why should anyone else.  It's inner skiing.

Note:  'inner skiing' is Lotho code for more than don't fuck up.  He means don't even think about fucking up.  If you believe you will fall, you will ski to someplace you are likely to fall and, presto, you will fall.  Don't even think it.  Inner skiing.  (Yes, it does work)


All the pieces are integrating and this jiggles the controls a little but it's a good jiggle.  I want one test and one test only so lots of measuring before the cut.  The good Reverend can't be rolling out there over and over as some blubbery lummox who is always testing, testing, testing.  The plan is one fair test.  Analyze and repair as necessary.  Go.


There's the potential for using what they call a Google Hangout for the broadcast but that's alienating to anyone on Facebook.  A similar system exists within Facebook but the same applies in reverse.  These social networks are largely closed systems and that makes them useless for any practical purpose (i.e. using the Internet like the Internet).

Therefore the show will be driven out of YouTube as it's the best socialist answer I can find in that it's free and anyone can get it.  I don't know what, if any, advertising YouTube will throw at you.  The good Reverend doesn't present any and has no control over what YouTube does but he really doesn't care much so long as it doesn't obscure the audio/video content.  He would like you to know it's not him doing it and he doesn't profit from it.

The show will be archived along with the rest of my videos after it's over so you can still see it even if you miss the live presentation.


That Skype open calling situation solves a lot of problems because it makes things simple.  If you want to call the Reverend, go for it.  If it's busy then best to wait and try again as the caller who did get through will go live immediately.

(Ed:  conference calls?)

The Reverend is open to them but they can get jumbled quickly if people try to talk at the same time (they usually do).  I learned of this from corporate conference calls rather than a long career as a preacher and the corporate calls are at least as psychotic as a revival meeting.  I imagine they play with snakes as well but you can explore that thought on your own time.

Hiding Out in the Open

Every day on the social networks you will see the Meme Parade ... but you will see very few people.  The social networks remind for all the world of kids trading baseball cards ... except kids get cards they like.

A meme is one of the many tawdry inventions of the Internet.  Perhaps you will take an aphorism from Mark Twain:  "If voting really did anything then they wouldn't let us do it."

Witty as always.

To millennialize it, stick that text on a picture of a cat.  Presto.  Now it's a meme and you are an Internet hero.


People post these things relentlessly online and you could scroll through the contributions of multiple people and see one meme after the other.  You couldn't get the Donald Trump meme psychopolooza off the network now with all the resources of the CIA, the NSA, and every hacker on the planet.  The only reaction a Trump meme elicits in me anymore is, "Fucking hell.  Bake the pizza.  The dough has risen too much already."


Trump is trivial but hiding behind memes is not.  They present an easy way to paint yourself in which you don't have to do anything to defend it.  This type of social network interplay is also something which would be effortless to program into a bot.  We haven't the faintest doubt that's been going on for a long time anyway.  The numbers Zuckerberg claims for Facebook are only what he can get away with claiming by whatever justification is enough to make corporate advertisers pay more for it.  Whether the numbers are real doesn't even matter.

There's a psychological resettlement taking place and people are withdrawing more and more while at the same time making a greater presentation of it through these memes to disguise the individual's true nature.  The only thing I can take from this is a clinical fear of revealing themselves and it's not because of any particular psychological deficit in them but rather in the conditioning which is coming at them from everywhere.

My immunity to this sort of thing is fairly high as the first time I saw it was when the other boys in the Infantry platoon, almost all at once, started writing things on their helmets such as We Kill Gooks.  They didn't even know what gooks were.  This sort of mass-hypnosis happens a lot here and it's one of the freakiest things about the country.

Cadillac Man said he respected my willingness to be forthright about things I believe even he doesn't necessarily agree with them.  I see nothing special in what I do but I do take disappointment in seeing fewer and fewer other people are willing.  I don't just think but know I don't do anything special.  My writing skills are fairly good which is a nice advantage but typing simply for the sake of seeing the words is something only for political speech writers.  These things are important to me and I strongly believe the mindset of a great many people would start shifting if we were more demonstrative about things which are important rather than railing endlessly about things which suck.

Women's Movement Goes Up in Smoke on the Campaign Trail

Earlier today it was announced via CNN that Carly Fiorina is claiming discrimination by the GOP against women is her downfall.

One down.


Now CNN tells us Clinton is charging Trump with female harassment, terrorism, and probably being the cause of the Chicago Fire.

Two down.


Elizabeth Warren never even showed up.

Three down.


Team away.


The only real batter in the mix never even got a fair pitch:

Jill Stein stands proud but the results of all the criminal PAC money crushes her and her valid message.  She has yet to scream discrimination but she takes more of it than all the others put together.  This one is a real woman.  The others ... well ...


Note:  we're aware the PAC money is legal.  It is criminal abuse of the system nevertheless.

The Revelation of The Fraisier

On the clan crest for the Frasers, it's written 'bearer of strawberries' and that seems unusual enough but it turns out we weren't just bearers of strawberries, we are the strawberries.  'Fraisier' means strawberry in French.

It wasn't that Americans borked the spelling by adding the letters but rather those pagan Scots did it by throwing letters out.  To some credit of America, they tried to make the spelling right ... but they borked it and the word became 'Frazier' which misspells it two ways at once.

Frazier yielded the best reason to fill your children's ears with wax if there is any chance someone may try to talk them into becoming psychologists.  The reigning el supremo intellecto of the TV comedian psychologists has a first name of Strawberry.  Analyze that, Klondyke.


So, I cracked it.  What do I win ... besides nothin', I mean.

(Ed:  a big heap of self-adoration.  Have a ball.)

Peaches, matey.